October 31, 2005
Trick or treat
The Flea-signal strikes fear into the hearts of Annexian evil doers!
Alone of its accursèd state,
One thing the hand of Time shall spare,
For the grim Idiot at the gate
Is deathless and eternal there.
North American Hallowe'en Prevention Initiative
Do they know it's Hallowe'en?
Gorillaz: Dirty Harry
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
It's all fun and games
Divine Intervention is the only one of these Hallowe'en games I have played. It is quite violent, quite fun and not quite suitable for the office.
Be water, my friend
You could maybe be as cool as Bruce Lee if you were Robert Mitchum or William Shatner or something but no way could you be more cool than Bruce Lee.
Ninja New York
I am reasonably certain a Manhattan-based Flea-reader should offer to take me to Ninja New York (whatever the New York Times has to say on the matter). Would I like to follow the "easy" or "difficult" path to my table? Difficult, thank you.
October 29, 2005
Amarantine
Ethereal pop songstress, Enya must be alarmed at the repeated castle-invasions she has suffered. There may be something to her unwordly, dare I say eldritch and tenebrous warblings, that attracts first-class nutters.
Let us hope she has better luck with Amarantine, her new album said to include three songs "written in a language Enya made up" (or rather by her lyricist, Roma Ryan... possibly called "Loxian"). And possibly a nameless piping sound from beyond space. Or possibly just ice skating.
Midori Hamada: Catch 22
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Head In A Jar
Your own Head In A Jar can be yours by following a few simple instructions.
El baile de Yoda
Yoda busts a move in what I believe to be an Easter Egg from the "Sith" something or other dvd. If so, Lucas lawyers are probably swatting copies of it across "the internet" so best viewed sooner rather than later.
DKNY leather pants
I missed my chance to purchase these fine DKNY mens leather pants (hat tip to a former servant of Her Majesty).
Thou art thy mother's glass
While people have been rather mean about Kelly Osbourne's figure she turns out to be an admirer of Kylie Minogue's. Echoing the considered observations of countless communication studies essays I have read, Kelly believes that "sex really does sell". Kelly is right to credit Kylie some of her success to her pixie-like proportions but Kylie also claims a vast gay fan base to whom her pixie-like figure is secondary to some nebulous something else. This something else is what Kelly might better spend her time cultivating than surgery and botox and so forth.
Meantime, Kelly's mother, Sharon Osbourne has offered some less than charitable observations about rock and pop aristocracy. The fun bit is decoding all the asterisks.
October 28, 2005
The Gospel According to Lestat
With her latest novel, Anne Rice tries "to get inside the head of a 7-year-old kid who's intermittently aware that he's also God Almighty".
The Cure: The end of the world
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Kal-El Cage
Nicholas Cage has named his son Kal-El. The name does not quite run in the family.
He said of his son's unusual name: "We wanted a name that was exotic, was American and stood for something good. So Kal-el was a name we came up with, and then Kal for short".
Supermen
John Ruch asks why Superman did not use his powers to end the Second World War. Good question.
The Nazis noticed the irony, too. A 1940 SS newspaper mocked Superman: "Once there was a man so strong that he could stop a speeding locomotive with his ring finger, but he didn’t do it."
The ersatz supermen of the SS were irked at a the thought of being smacked down by a chap in red underwear. One cannot help but notice their failure to mention the comic in question featured Superman hauling both Hitler and Stalin off for the judgement of the League of Nations. It is nice to learn the dictator's feelings were considered too touchy to withstand comic book mockery. One can only hope Kim Jong Il feels the same way about Team America: World Police. And whatever the brain trust at today's DC Comics might think, our updated League of Nations has sadly become an object of derision rather than a court of last resort (some nsfw language in that last link). Though I expect the same might be said for the efficacy of the original League of Nations.
October 27, 2005
Lipsync and karaoke
My favourite part of this boy band visual karaoke effort is the non-reaction of the roommate. I expect he is used to this sort of thing. No word on whether Ashley got her prom date. These Happy Boys and Girls best friends had no audience perhaps due to not having memorized the lyrics. They are going to need more practice before taking their show on the road. Some pointers from karoake sensei Fred Marshall are in order. His rendition of Always by Atlantic Star is particularly affecting.
Jenn Cuneta: Come Rain Come Shine
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Tweaking
At least one CNN staffer is refusing to buy the new "Star Wars" Episode III dvd release, convinced the tinkering "won't end until George Lucas is dead."
No! Stop throwing things! I'm kidding! Kidding!
Battle of Yavin
Beagle features Snoopy and Woodstock taking on the Empire. Lots more fan films where that came from.
TIE Fighter
Wanting this TIE Fighter case mod.
October 26, 2005
Higgins was not Robin Masters
I have a friend who claims Higgins was actually Robin Masters, fictional multi-millionaire novelist and man of mystery (portrayed in an uncredited performance by Orson Welles). Magnum P.I. foil, and true hero of the show, Jonathan Quayle Higgins III cut a fine Flea-ish figure of a man. But broke-ass journalism student, Shaun disagrees he was Robin Masters. He is quite right to do so.
Higgins may have confessed his true identity in the show's final episode but he was joking. Having already fooled Magnum about his identity at least twice over the course of the series this sort of joke was entirely typical of the character's sense of humour. If anyone was secretly Robin Masters it was in all probability Magnum himself. Perhaps he had suffered a psychotic break as fall-out from his experiences at Da Nang. More likely he did not want his homeboys, T.C. and Rick, to know he was writing novels.
Update: Criley3 argues Robin Masters is none other than Thomas Magnum II, Magnum's grandfather.
El Presidente: Rocket
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Revolutionary
Nintendo has released an explanatory ad for its controversial new Revolution controller. Cute, but I remain to be convinced.
Transparent armour
In related news, the United States air force is field testing fashion-forward boxer-briefs as a replacement to traditional tightie-whities made obsolete by technological developments.
The Air Force Research Laboratory's materials and manufacturing directorate is testing aluminum oxynitride -- ALONtm -- as a replacement for the traditional multi-layered glass transparencies now used in existing ground and air armored vehicles.
Dark matter
Calculations by University of Victoria physicists, Fred Cooperstock and Steven Tieu shed new light on purported dark matter. I had thought the whole "we cannot see it therefore it must be there" premise sounded a bit dodgy.
October 25, 2005
Ian Fleming at Camp-X
Some confusion as to the location of an hotel room, and the hotel room turning out to be a mock-up, do not take away the thrill of learning Ian Fleming trained at Camp-X during the War.
The Life of Ian Fleming, the biography by British author John Pearson, says Fleming was unable to carry out an order to kill a man, described as a dangerous enemy agent, in a Toronto hotel room during the Second World War when Fleming was taking intelligence training near Oshawa, Ontario.
Goldeneye
Stay at Oracabessa, St. Mary on the northern coast of Jamaica. At Goldeneye.
Damian Marley: Welcome to Jamrock
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance. More Damian Marley and walking bass goodness may be found here.
Soccer Ball
Just the thing to help concentrate the brain juice of a Monday morning. I managed eighteen kicks and decided to pass the problem on to you.
Dabbawallas, The
Two church fair visits this last weekend have left me with an intense craving for food prepared with grandmotherly care. Especially, say, a south asian grannie. Paul Goodman's documentary about dabbawallas shows how people of limited means can manage the complex logistical problem of making certain no home cooked meal fails to find its proper object of affection. Or rather, how networks are capable of so doing. Dabbawallas are "box people" so named for the containers (called "dabbas" or "tiffins") holding the home cooking of the grandmothers of nothern Mumbai, formerly known as Bombey. The dabbawallas are a legion of delivery men who make certain each box makes its way by train to the specific city centre offices of each family member waiting for lunch.
October 24, 2005
Kate Bush: King of the Mountain
Writing for the Guardian, Michael Berkeley discusses the precision fit of non-fit in the musical writing of Kate Bush, Female First has an exclusive on the reclusive chanteuse while Male First can address "King of the Mountain" without a hint of hyperbole:
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Miss Speed-O-Rama
The Flea's occasional series on Object Lessons in Objectification™ continues with this Speed-O-Rama Bikini Contest. Scandalous stuff. The appropriate contemporary English usage is, of course, Ms Speed-O-Rama.
The Naked News promo at the tail end of the video features bare-breasted women so is probably not safe for work unless you are employed in a naked news organization.
Ali G on fashion
Now fashion, it well important innit?
Quakecon
It is startling how many comely young women appear to be fans of Doom or Quake. Or are at least employed to appear interested in Doom or Quake.
Frumpy to foxy
Dress Phoebe and increase her foxitude for this book marketing viral. My result was less than promising.
The mix and match lingerie is definitely frumpy.
Not promising for the book, that is. What nonsense. The black evening number did not require a bra and my mix and match compromise was a fun improvisation on a frumpy selection. More important, the clunky loafers were hot. The only shaggable-making item in this poor girl's closet, in fact (excepting the champagne, of course).
October 22, 2005
Magician's assistant
Ad buyers and firms with expensive product placements are concerned at stalled ratings for reality television. Survivor is not doing that badly relative to its Thursday night competition though a 19% drop in viewership has got to hurt. I am forced to ask what they can possibly expect having voted magician's assistant, Morgan McDevitt off "the island" so early in the running. Some say a decorative appearance and an aptitude for not being sawn in two are hardly skills to boast about. I say, let them try it. My long-standing search for a qualified magician's assistant has convinced me of the rarity of her skill set. As for concerned ad buyers, it is time to invest in the Flea sidebar.
Laura Veirs
Watching Laura Veirs in a studio session for Australian radio I am thinking, "I have dated this woman." Hooking up to streaming music and the Galaxies video from Year of Meteors I am thinking, "Several times."
Some variation on another obvious tag-line
No, no, he's not dead... he's... he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage!
I'll Rochambeau you for it
By a peculiar coincidence, I was trying to improvise a substitute carpet beater earlier this week. Having seen the original, and implicitly gruesome, version of James Bond's first torture scene I am just as happy for the latest remake to give it a miss. And I doubt any remake could surpass the creepiness of Peter Lorrie as Le Chiffre.
Producers want the 2006 movie to be as close to Sir Ian Fleming's novel as possible, so have committed to recreating the scene in which Bond is held captive by baddie Le Chiffre.
England expects that every man will do his duty
Soldier of Gondor: The beacon! The beacon of Amon Din is lit.
Gandalf: Hope is kindled.
A thousand beacons lit the sky in celebration of the 200th anniversary of victory at Trafalgar. Truly something to see.
May God bless Lord Nelson.
Hundreds more were lit across the country, mirroring the beacons of 1805. Had Nelson lost the battle, they would have stood ready to give warning of an invasion by Napoleon's armies.
October 21, 2005
Casino Royale with cheese
While my crime-fighting responsibilities precluded serious consideration of the idea, Lee Pfeiffer reveals the Flea was not the only star of stage and screen to decline the new Bond role at the last moment (hat tip to the Flea's Network Warfare Expert).
Snack-Man
Snack-Man is a nice little diversion for a Friday. Except for you Agent C. You have far too much work to be getting on with.
Keyshia Cole: I should have cheated
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
How the mind works
If I had not recently read Steven Pinker's "How the Mind Works" I would have been utterly baffled by My Humps. "Monkey business", indeed.
Actually, whatever his publisher's copy has to say, Pinker does not argue "the mind is a computer". He spends a good deal of time distancing himself from this position instead arguing for the applicability of computational theory to a mind whose design is modular. From this starting point it is possible to account for rather complex behaviours arising from - quite literally - primitive rules.
It is not that Pinker demystifies difference in behaviour between sexes in species who reproduce sexually. It is not even that Black Eyed Peas have rendered consequently differing priorities with such brutal clarity. It is that despite knowing what I know that I cannot help but find the video fascinating. Enthralling.
October 20, 2005
Male order
A variety of Flea-ish outfits by International Male, a once notoriously dodgy mail order catalogue, were field tested by Andrew Goldman for Radar Magazine.
But on this, the eve of destruction of the International Male, I resolved that I would repress those feelings for a full week, wear International Male — from the white crochet driving hat down to the tan, strappy gladiator sandals—24 hours a day, and unleash the inner swinger that’s been hip-thrusting within. It would not be easy.
By the time I got to the mesh top ensemble for Jewish speed-dating I was laughing so I could hardly breath. The man is a hero.
Dress Kevin
He did not know what to wear, so he made a website.
The Juan Maclean: Give Me Every Little Thing
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance. Quite possibly nsfw due to Y-fronts. For a variety of reasons, actually. Best not to watch it unless you are wearing Hai Karate.
But especially speak no Evel
Mental note: do not mess with Evel Knievel.
Creative destruction
Chosunilbo asks if golfing sensation Michelle Wie might be a role-model for business management everywhere.
Here is footage of the controversial ball drop in question (no bee footage, regrettably). Further Michelle Wie research materials provided courtesy of Porchboy, the Flea's Interpersonal Skillz Development Coach.
October 19, 2005
Torchwood
Dr. Who supergenius, Russell T Davies is to pen a 13-part drama for the BBC. Torchwood is Captain Jack's very own spin-off series, a first for the Who franchise (hat tip to the Sister of the Flea).
Given the right strangled pronunciation there is a pun and, given Davies' sense of humour, a double entendre lurking in the title somewhere.
Eurythmics: I've Got A Life
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Lost and found
The Flea's lost and found department is pleased to report the recovery of the anchor from the Mary Rose, a happy byproduct of preparation for the Royal Navy's next generation carriers expected in 2012. Exceptionally low tides on the coast of Suffolk revealed bits and pieces of sunken Dunwich. Shipping industries are suggested though the whole pervades with the sense of tentacles if you ask me. From underwater to underground, an aestal was recovered by a metal detecting enthusiast on an Aughton farm. Though I had no idea what an aestal was until I read the article I doubt I would have mistaken it for a milk bottle top. A most sensible device it turns out to be.
Goddess, Princess, Whore
"Former Oxford University scholar", Bettany Hughes argues for the existence of an historical Helen of Troy. The Flea is unsurprised to learn "tawny red hair and blue eyes" feature prominently.
The House of Hermogenes
In 146 B.C., Priene is a Greek city-state and free ally of Rome. Some to do in Cappadocia behind them, the people get on with home building projects. Duly house proud Hermogenes takes an interest.
October 18, 2005
Paris apology
Jetsetter, Paris Hilton has reportedly apologized to Nicole Richie in a bid to overcome the gulf that has grown up between them (hat tip to Porchboy).
A source close to the blonde revealed: "Paris decided to do it after friends stepped in and told her she was being petty."
No word on whether the cause of the feud, hacked cell phones or sex tape pranks gone wrong, is to be definitively revealed. Even so, and while not in time to save the fourth season of The Simple Life on Fox, one can only applaud two young women doing their best to mend a friendship. Perhaps this means the two can go ahead will their plan to room with families featuring "frisky dads". Best not confused with "family entertainment".
Stereo MCs: Paradise
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Curry and rice girl
I find a peculiar solidarity within myself for MC Vickram and LudaKrishna in their quest for a curry and rice girl.
Peter Jackson's King Kong
While I cannot speak to the animation for the forthcoming Peter Jackson King Kong epic feature, its XBox 360 equivalent is stunning.
The beginning is nigh
Virals for the XBox 360 demonstrate the "typical MS 'WTF is this supose to mean' marketing". Very clever, too (hat tip to Porchboy with thanks for this forwarded mail).
Source: A forum thread on Xbox365.com.
The official story: "Microsoft does not comment on rumors or
speculation."--Microsoft spokesperson.
What we heard: Here we go again. It appears that Microsoft has started yet another viral marketing campaign. The first signs surfaced on the Xbox365.com forums on October 13. That's when a poster named "Lutz" started a thread titled "The beginning is nigh" above a photo of a curious, approximately 100-foot-wide symbol carved into San Francisco's Ocean Beach. The symbol is comprised of the roman numerals for 8, 1, and 6 in between a circle and a hexagon. Later on in the thread, Lutz posts two more pictures of the same symbol appearing in a field in Tulsa, Oklahoma, and another beach in Jacksonville, Florida.
When asked what the symbol was, Lutz's sole written reply was "I will enlist the help of the truly committed, but first you must solve my puzzle." That statement sounds very much like the puzzle challenges on Ourcolony.net, the teaser site which helped hype the release of the Xbox 360. So it was little surprise when, within a few posts, fans were already speculating that that the numbers were a date--8/1/2006--and that said date was the release of, in the words of one poster, "OMG! HALO3!!"
Today, members of the games press got proof positive that the whole Hex business is indeed another viral marketing ploy. Late this afternoon, members of the games press were sent an e-mail "tip" with pictures of the oh-so mysterious Hex sign on various objects and still more mysterious text that sounds like the mutterings of a half-crazed pagan prophet. "The sign is a puzzle, and it is a promise: 'I will bring them together to witness the New Beginning before the rest of the world. And I will reward them with a physical manifestation of the power of this sign.'" It also says the sign would appear at four college football games on Saturday, October 1: Duke University vs. Georgia Tech (Durham, NC); Syracuse University vs. Rutgers (Syracuse, NY); Rice University vs. Tulsa (Tulsa, OK); Connecticut vs. University of Cincinnati (Cincinnati, OH). It also gives this bloated oath: "At noon on October 18, the true purpose of the sign will be revealed, and the truly committed will have their chance to experience the New Beginning before the rest of the world."
But for all the mysterious portends in the body of the "tip" e-mail, there's no question about its humble origins in Microsoft's hype machine. Bearing the subject line "TIP: the beginning is nigh for 360 fans," the e-mail was sent by none other than 4orty2wo Entertainment, the marketing firm which originated Ilovebees.com.
So what will be announced at noon on October 18? While not impossible, chances are it will not be Halo 3. A more probable outcome is the company will use the date to either unveil the Xbox 360's final games lineup or game price point. There's also the possibility of it being something along the lines of Origen360.com, which teased the world for weeks about ... a contest in Europe that Americans can't even play.
(Author's note to 4orty2wo Entertainment: I want the 76 minutes of my life it took to write up this rumor back.)
October 17, 2005
Bond girl crumpet worry
Rachel Stevens, fresh from her contretemps with Marilyn Manson, has announced she too would like to be the new Bond girl for Casino Royale. Competition for the part of Vesper Lynd is reportedly fierce.
Blond Bond stallion Daniel Craig should be credited for eliciting interest in, and a potential bun fight for, the job from Jessica Alba, Sienna Miller and Kelly Brook. Oh, and Angelina Jolie. There is only one reasonable way to settle the matter: Jell-O wrestling. Marquis of Queensbury rules apply (except rule no. 2, naturally).
Rachel Stevens: I said never again (but here we are)
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Public service announcement
This Rachel Stevens public service announcement might be considered not safe for work for a variety of reasons. Flea-readers outside the UK who have forgotten S Club 7 may wonder just who this Rachel Stevens might be. Quite lovely (if also nsfw).
The remarkable pebble
Saying, "The time has come to live my life exactly how I want", Kylie Minogue plans to skydive over Ayers Rock. The image conjured defies description. Also known as Uluru, Ayers Rock is considered sacred to many Australian aboriginal peoples as well as a variety of new agers. And now possibly Kylie fanciers.
Playing the Angel
For those Flea-readers who cannot wait for the new Depeche Mode album, the band has thoughtfully streamed the whole thing to their MySpace site.
Some variation on the most obvious tag-line ever
War-hero and Canadian icon, James "Scotty" Doohan is to be beamed up this December.
Doohan, a Canadian who died in July at age 85, is forever linked to four iconic words - 'Beam me up, Scotty,' the request by other Enterprise crew members when they returned from space adventures.
October 15, 2005
Einstein's Big Idea
If I had known about Einstein's Big Idea* in advance I would have alerted Flea-readers to it rather than writing about it after the fact. I came in half way through when I overheard the unique laugh that sets my heart on fire. Shirley Henderson was enthralling as Eistein's first wife, Mileva Maric. When Einstein became famous he ditched her, married his cousin and became a physics super-mac. The cad.
*E = mc2, by the way.
Formula One
A problem with F1 racing is that most venues make it difficult to apprehend just how fast the vehicles are moving and just how sharp a proper driver's reflexes must be. Here is an idea.
Spartan-117
Halo's Master Chief is seven feet tall, apparently. Installation 04 is ten-thousand kilometers in diameter and the Monitors are named after powers of seven. Nice.
In related news, I want the flamethrower.
Pillar of Autumn
The Pillar of Autumn sculpted in the round using Lego. And in plexiglass.
October 14, 2005
Alba, Jessica Alba
Jessica Alba would like to be the next Bond girl. What an excellent plan.
Yes, I was a bit unclear on that last part. Nice to have the variety issue covered so succinctly. In related news, some chap has been named to be the new 007 for the forthcoming Casino Royale. He is the blond variety, apparently.
MI6
The Secret Intelligence Service, commonly known as MI6, is recruiting on its website. Their pitch is very mission statementy. Not sure how a coffee bar compares to, say, bo staff training as a hook for potential recruits.
Objects in the mirror
Keira Knightley reportedly loved filming Pirates of the Caribbean thanks to some inventive, if in my opinion entirely unwarranted, special effects.
She told US chat show host Jay Leno: "I got my cleavage painted in. They do it with a paint brush and lots of different colours and shades and it's great. I wish I could do it every morning."
Flash-Ball
Flash-Ball is a "revolutionary defense weapon". Just the ticket for those seeking a non-lethal yet dissuasive looking alternative to conventional firearms. French, by the way, and most futuristic after a Luc Besson fashion (via the Flea's Career Development Liason).
BACKTO_1400-CENSORED
A little patience with statistics talk, and the mystery of some brittlecone pine data, are rewarded by a critique of the "hockey stick" data used to underpin too much talk about global warming (via Zacht Ei).
October 13, 2005
Sense and Sensibility
Because one can never have enough Jane Austen, she wrote six novels fyi, the BBC has announced a new television adaptation of Sense and Sensibility is in the works. Andrew Davis, writer of the BBC adaptation of Pride and Prejudice and who therefore is to blame, comments on charges Austen has been over-adapted for television and film.
The Dead 60s: Loaded Gun
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance (waving a lighter over my head in devotion to the delectable SondraK).
Difficulties
The Hutchinson Dictionary of Difficult Words should come in handy.
Metro Arts and Architecture
Subways need not be boring or dreary! Toronto has much to learn from Moscow and Berlin, undergroundwise.
Departing Metros
Subway trains of the world doing their thing. And some facts and oddities of metro rings should come in handy. Vaguely nice to see Toronto's TTC has the best old school logo.
Ethical dilemma
An ethical dilemma arrives courtesy of "the internet". Not quite the Prisoner's Dilemma but illustrative nonetheless.
An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
An old friend who once saved your life.
The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.
Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only be one passenger in your car?
Think before you continue reading.
This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application.
You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first.
Or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back.
However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.
The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer.
He simply answered:
"I would give the car keys to my old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams."
Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations.
Never forget to "Think Outside of the Box."
HOWEVER, the correct answer is:
Run the old lady over and put her out of her misery, have sex with the perfect partner on the hood of the car, then drive off with the old friend for a few beers.
God, I just love happy endings.
October 12, 2005
Late Flea
Dear Flea-readers, publication will be late to never today as my monitor experienced a catastrophic something or other last night. Time for a replacement. Working the problem!
October 11, 2005
All that glitters is not Goldfrapp
While it is true she is not Kylie Minogue, as a fan of vixen-fronted synthpop I would have been delighted to see Alison Goldfrapp perform at the Brixton Academy no matter the reviews.
Halo Easter Eggs
A variety of small detail from Bungie's Halo. Haven't quite got the Seige of Madrigal to play yet.
Satanic yoga
Yoga and Satanism: can they be united? No probs, apparently. Though given the wall-eyed fanaticism of most yoginis and the crap music enjoyed by most Satanists there will be trouble at the wedding. Well done with the sly little pun about "yoga" and "united" there.
Grimoires
The Necronomicon was one of many grimoires both fictional and non-fictional to flap about in the margins of the writing of H.P. Lovecraft.
Building a Mythos Tome
Make your own grimoire at home. A nice little project for an autumn afternoon.
Bookbinding
Bookbinding, a tutorial.
October 10, 2005
K-Maro: Femme Like U
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance (via Beautiful Atrocities).
Mansion Impossible
It took me 30 years to buy my mansion.
Earthdance 2005
Because every time I dance I am thinking about peace and hope and unity through diversity and such like.
Eden projects
Because we can't get enough of that Canadian content. Flea-readers sheltered by the CRTC are being treated to a Thanksgiving Day marathon turkeyfest of Earth 2. While I am certain it does wonders to protect the 2.4 jobs created at Space ("The Imagination Station") I fail to see how rebroadcasting an American show does wonders for the fragile Canadian self-concept. I am told that as a pay-channel Space does not have to comply with Canadian content regulations so even that bastion of the local ideology provides no excuse for the cartel that keeps me from escaping to, say, a Brazillian sci-fi channel.
Meanwhile nothing protects us from this monstrosity. It is obvious not only that the show's characters would all be utterly useless in a survival situation but that its entire production team has never lit a fire or put up a tent. Instead of worrying about pesky details like food, shelter or marauding aliens the characters bitch about their lot while viewers are supposed to adopt the perspective of an unpleasant seven year old girl. This is self-indulgent eco-nonsense for people with no interest in actual sciences including and especially ecology. Thankfully, there were few to be found among sf fans. Earth 2 did not fail because it was poorly conceived, written and acted though its failure was exceptional by any of these standards. It failed because every character was so unsympathetic, so loathsome, that a casual reviewer can only hope these castaways perish to the last man, woman and child. Hopefully Tim Curry will oblige.
October 08, 2005
The silence of the lame
The continuing adventures of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have an edutational aspect vis a vis Dianetics and Scientology. Now Holmes is reported to be pregnant we learn of L. Ron Hubbard's injunctions regarding childbirth and neonatal care.
The doctrine also states that newborns cannot be poked or prodded for medical tests or even spoken to for the first seven days of their lives, believing that babies go through so much pain during the birth, they shouldn't have to experience any further discomfort or sensory experience that could return later in life to haunt them.
Though only ages 12 through death
Overheard in Toronto:
(hat tip to Porchboy)
Armand Van Helden: When The Lights Go Down
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
The War of the Worlds (1953)
In 30 seconds, re-enacted by bunnies.
Milky sea
Satellite imagery has captured a region of the Indian Ocean off the coast of Somalia, "about the size of Connecticut", glowing for three nights on end. Very Jules Verne. I am not certain why it took ten years to report this finding. Though from the satellite image it is alarming to note how obviously electricity and democracy, and especially the civil rights of women, go together.
Batmaaaaaaan
It is simply irresponsible to tell me dolphins can do this and not provide an mp3 file alongside the story.
October 07, 2005
Bellissima
Casting Wonder Woman was obvious in retrospect. Flea-reader Dorkafork sums up his winning suggestion for the ideal Amazon:
"Because Monica Bellucci can't not be nominated."
Caffé Latte with Natalie Portman
By a peculiar coincidence, I also put my problems on hold on Sundays (hat tip to Porchboy).
Sorry, my mixtape
Aziz Ansari challenged his roommate Zach to see who could come up with the worst mixtape. I bet I could come up with five worse tunes.
Mirabile indictu
Members of the Italian Committee for the Investigation of the Paranormal (Cicap) are out to debunk events popularly construed as miracles. In the case of the San Genaro event, however, church authorities seem willing neither to fully endorse nor allow unfettered scientific investigation of a twice annual bloody manifestation. Not sure what any of this spectacle has to do with Christianity. Best have a witch look into the matter.
According to tradition, the transformation of the blood of San Gennaro, preserved in two phials, protects the city from disasters such as earthquakes or an eruption of Mount Vesuvius.
Saint Peter's panorama
Get your virtual Rome on.
October 06, 2005
Holy cow
A rhyton is a drinking vessel typically taking an horned animal shape in a metonymous gesture to its function as an elaborate drinking horn. Gohar Tepe excavation team leader, Ali Mahforouzi has announced the discovery of some rather appealing cow rhytons left in an Iron Age rubbish bin in what is now northern Iran. He believes these cups demonstrate people living in ancient Iran "worshiped oxen and humped cows".
Leaving aside any grammatical trickiness of Mahforouzi's statement, several caveats should also be raised. It is one thing to hold cows in considerable reverence and quite another to worship them. Furthermore, large predators, raptors and aggressive herbivores are always a safe choice as totemic figures for noble lineages or indeed contemporary nation states. This is not to say that Americans worship the bald eagle. Finally, there is the perennial archealogical habit of reading religious import, ceremony and ritual into objects showing a hint of artistic merit. Perhaps these decorative cups were part of a collection on an iron age cow fancier. Now that NHL hockey has returned, Canadians are going to be treated to all sorts of totemic displays but this is not to suggest Canadians worship hockey (ok, bad example).
Rammstein: Benzin
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
The Mary Rose
In a bid to raise her anchor the figurehead of the Mary Rose, pride of Henry VIII's fleet, may have been found.
The Mary Rose was named after Henry's favourite sister and the royal Tudor rose which became its emblem. The Mary Rose was described by a contemporary as "the flower" of his fleet, and its humiliating loss one of the greatest disasters to befall Henry's navy.
C-evo
A fun freeware empire building game in the spirit of Sid Meier's Civilization.
October 05, 2005
Breast Cancer Awareness Month
The Daily Mail is auctioning a bra previously owned by, indeed designed and signed by, Kylie Minogue. A snip at £6,900!
Paul Mac: Sunshine Eyes
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Update: Flea-readers who are residents of Australia can win the single from InTheMix (closes October 11).
Update: That link seems to have given up the ghost but the Yahoo! Australia has the video, if in miniature, that is still worth a look. This is the most gorgeous song I have heard in ages.
Wyrd Sisters
Wyrd Sisters, a Winnipeg-based folk act have their brooms out of joint as a band with a similar name is to appear in the new Harry Potter film. Though I can hardly see how J.K. Rowling's Weird Sisters, not even to be named in their on screen appearance, could possibly infringe on whatever income a Winnipeg folk act brings in Warner's legal advice apparently wanted to settle any potential dispute by making a cash offer in adance to share the name. When I read "The Goblet of Fire", I assumed the name was a tip of the hat to Terry Pratchett. His Wyrd Sisters, a not unlikely source of inspiration for the folks in Winnipeg, was published in 1988, two years before they claim to have started using the name. And by this logic, shouldn't Shakespeare's sisters be due for a cut?
Much more encouraging news is the line-up for the wizarding world's most popular pop act.
Halo
While Bill Gate's anticipation of Halo 3 for next spring was a touch premature, gamers can celebrate the announcement of an executive producer for the forthcoming Halo feature film. There's a Lord of the Ring pun in here somewhere but it is not coming to me (hat tip to Porchboy).
As well as contributing to its production, Jackson will also lend the use of his Weta film studio to work on the special effects. Like Jackson, Weta has previously worked on the Lord of the Rings trilogy and this Christmas's King Kong.
October 04, 2005
We paint penguins pink
Even the cover art for "Aerial", Kate Bush' first album in too many moons is engrossing fans. The artwork is said to conceal a soundwave image of a "visual representation of spoken, or sung words over music."
So far the leading suggestion are ‘We paint penguins pink’, 'Elvis is alive’ and 'Wind and waves of love’ although its not known if any of these are correct.
"King of the Mountain", first single from the forthcoming album, is already floating about the etheric byways of "the internet". And it is gorgeous.
SuicideGirls
A number of SuicideGirls, punk and gothic totty for the discriminating (if aging) gothic gentleman blogeur, have abandoned their positions. Ahem. They now feel exploited, apparently (hat tip to Porchboy).
Wired's article does not explore the reason semi-nude cheesecake photography including tattoos and nipple-piercings should be liberating one day and compromising the next. BoingBoing, sponsored by SuicideGirl ads, attempts to unravel some of the purported business concerning the FBI. AntiChris provides a list of grievances while UnPink offers a blog dedicated to recording "the jiggly fall of an alt porn icon". I am still uncertain quite what the difficulty is founded upon though contractual disputes, a reported hostile working environment and nebulous charges of "neocon" sympathies all figure prominently. Though in all seriousness, the site was hardly worth a look once Apnea left for Lithium Picnic so it is all a bit much of a muchness.
The Avengers
I confess it had never crossed my mind to wonder just what The Avengers were avenging. Shocking to learn Patrick Macnee's John Steed, perhaps the ultimate Flea role-model, was not always the character we came to know and emulate.
Update: A Flea-reader writes with to highlight an important point I overlooked and am now looking over.
Spike
Joss Whedon has addressed the possibility of a Spike feature film.
Update: Oops. That would be a made-for-tv movie and not a feature. And that would make more sense. Good to see Amy Acker would sign on despite her Alias schedule.
October 03, 2005
Confessions on a Dancefloor
Madonna is to launch her new album in Japan where I imagine her "future disco" sound will go over well.
While the music may not have been preconceived one cannot say the same for all the lyrics. One track, "Isaac", is said to be a tribute to Isaac Luria, 16th-century kabbalah supergenius. Not sure what they will make of that in Japan.
Tzimtzum and "Differance"
Sanford L. Drob considers Derrida and the Lurianic Kabbalah. Though I am certain both Isaac Luria and Jacques Derrida would be troubled by the "and" linking their hermeneutics of inscription.
Dannii Minogue: Perfection
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Kate Moss cocaine video
It took a week but video of Kate Moss and cocaine makes its way to you, the Flea-reader, thanks to the privacy obliterating wonder that is "the internet" (features nsfw ads). Cool fact: I am reliably informed cocaine use makes people glamorous, sexy and popular.
The Ballad of Sarah and Davey
Sarah decides to achieve closure on her relationship with Davey.
I have had a difficult time, over the past few years, achieving closure of our relationship. It is time for me to seek this. I have gone through the appropriate stages of anger, remorse, sadness. It is now time for me to close this chapter of my life.
Davey replies.
Complaint letter of the year
UK Flea-readers might consider this complaint letter before deciding to switch from BT to NTL.
I have been an NTL customer since 9th July 2001, when I signed up for your 3-in-one deal for cable TV, cable modem, and telephone. During this three-month period I have encountered inadequacy of service which I had not previously considered possible, as well as ignorance and stupidity of monolithic proportions. Please allow me to provide specific details, so that you can either pursue your professional prerogative, and seek to rectify these difficulties - or more likely (I suspect) so that you can have some entertaining reading material as you while away the working day smoking B&H and drinking vendor-coffee on the bog in your office
October 01, 2005
When I Hie to Kolob
The QandO Blog spots an apparent continuity error in the revised Battlestar Galactica. But then, Glen A. Larson was a Mormon so the blunder might not be irretrievable.
OK, it's an interesting conceit.
Or, at least it was, until Colonel Tigh blurts out in one dramatic scene, "Send down a search party for Chrissakes!"
"Moon-men, (Brigham) Young teaches us, dress like Quakers." Quite right, too.
Shining
The wonders of post-production editing and a well-known film finds a new life. Actually, I'd rather see the revised edit than Kubrick's version (hat tip to Porchboy).
Update: Here is an edit of the Titanic trailer. Time to rearrange some deck chairs.
Stewie Griffin: Sexy Party
Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.
Bartenders
A sound word of advice: know your bartender.