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November 30, 2004

Snake Plissken

I had an image of Snake Plissken here but some guy hotlinked it so I am removing it. I am certain you can find charming images of Snake Plissken using, for example, Google's image search.

Male Objectification Week at the Flea™ continues with Kurl Russell
as Snake Plissken (just to show I am paying attention, Debbye!). We should maybe wear eye-patches and get Che-style Plissken T-shirts made. Well, the eye-patches anyway.

Snake Plissken: Got a smoke?

Malloy: The United States is a non-smoking nation! No smoking, no drugs, no alcohol, no women - unless you're married - no foul language, no red meat!

Snake Plissken: Land of the free.
Posted by the Flea at 05:58 AM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (1)

Bonobo: Pick Up

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 05:57 AM | TrackBack (0)

Epic

All I can see is a metallic skeletal foot stomping on a human skull. Though I admit I never imagined bloggers would be in part to blame (via the Flea's speed expert).

Posted by the Flea at 05:55 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Warcraft

Warcraft in Flash animation.

Posted by the Flea at 05:53 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Pepsi Spice Project

Ok, so when I saw a time-limited Pepsi Holiday Spice beverage I bought it immediately. Despite a friend's assertion that Diet Lime Coke and Vanilla Coke are "unnecessary" I will purchase almost any gimmick product. But even I think the Pepsi Spice Project is taking the idea to an extreme (via Attu).

Q: What is this experiment?

A: I will drink Pepsi Holiday Spice for 45 days, and nothing else.. no water, milk, nothing... but Pepsi Holiday Spice.
Posted by the Flea at 05:46 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

November 29, 2004

Dirty Harry

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Welcome to Male Objectification Week at the Flea™. Our first male model is Clint Eastwood as Dirty Harry... kick ass!

District Attorney Rothko: Where does it say that you have the right to kick down doors, torture suspects, deny medical attention and legal counsel? Where have you been? Does Escobedo ring a bell? Miranda? Why surely you've heard of the Fourth Amendment? What I'm saying is that man had rights.

Harry Callahan: Well, I'm all broken up over that man's rights!
Posted by the Flea at 11:37 AM | Comments (8) | TrackBack (1)

Phenomenon

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 11:33 AM | TrackBack (0)

Mercury

Meet the lucky ones.

Posted by the Flea at 11:29 AM | TrackBack (0)

Reverse dictionary

I tried "wave at flag with respect" to try out this Reverse Dictionary. First search result: salute. Impressive.

OneLook's reverse dictionary lets you describe a concept and get back a list of words and phrases related to that concept. Your description can be a few words, a sentence, a question, or even just a single word.
Posted by the Flea at 11:26 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Fantasy airplanes

Fantasy Planes catalogues "schemes that were too visionary, some are found in fiction, and some were practical aircraft that lost out somewhere between blue sky and finished prototype." The Lippisch P.13a coal-fired ramjet interceptor, for example.

Posted by the Flea at 11:21 AM | TrackBack (0)

My Crappy Life

Drudge Report linked to the story of Rachelle Waterman, a teenager accused of conspiring in the murder of her mother. The Anchorage Daily News details the ongoing drama of her LiveJournal but does not name it: My Crappy Life.

Just to let everyone know, my mother was murdered

I won't have computer acess until the weekend or so because the police took my computer to go through the hard drive. I thank everyone for their thoughts and e-mails, I hope to talk to you when I get my computer back.
Posted by the Flea at 11:17 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

JFK. WTF?


What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

This is a sly dig about Ecosystem link ranking, right?

Posted by the Flea at 11:11 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (0)

November 27, 2004

Oops!

This post has been removed at the request of the linkee! We had a journalism malfunction.

Posted by the Flea at 10:20 AM | TrackBack (1)

Beastie Boys: Triple Trouble

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 10:17 AM | TrackBack (0)

Hextris

Hextris: because Tetris is for the weak.

Posted by the Flea at 10:15 AM | TrackBack (0)

Louise Brooks

Louis Brooks magazine covers from the '20s and '30s. Oh yes.

The Town Crier, represented four times, was the Sunday magazine section of the Wichita Beacon, Brooks' hometown newspaper. The actress first appeared on the cover of the August 16, 1925 issue. A few months later, Brooks appeared in the background on the magazine's anniversary edition. (Actress Colleen Moore is depicted in the foreground.) Brooks appeared again just three months later.
Posted by the Flea at 10:10 AM | TrackBack (0)

DREAD

News of the DREAD Weapon System arrives via the Flea's dromology expert who wonders if it is a hoax.

The following article contains a link to the DREAD Weapon System Video. This is the first time this video has ever been shown to the public. The DREAD depicted in the video is a functional prototype that operates on a less-than-lethal mode. This prototype was dismantled for security purposes to protect the technology, after the making of this video.
Posted by the Flea at 10:05 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 26, 2004

Freedom

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Trudeaupia explains.

Posted by the Flea at 08:15 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack (1)

Men's lore

Isn't there something in Iron John about men's mysteries?

Posted by the Flea at 08:13 AM | TrackBack (0)

Rezelscheft!

Rezelscheft!

Posted by the Flea at 08:10 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Campus Matrix

Campus Matrix makes me want to get dressed up and shoot some DIY Matrix movies.

Posted by the Flea at 08:09 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Comments

I would be grateful if someone could tell me how to rename or move my mt-comments.cgi file so as to make it moderately more difficult for the spambots to find it. I am also looking to hire someone to upgrade my blog to MT3. Advice would be most welcome.

Posted by the Flea at 08:08 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack (1)

Delft

A digital photo taken from Delft University claims to be the largest in the world at an impressive 2.5 gigapixels. While fun to navigate the view is not much to look at.

The 2.5 gigapixel image is a composition of images rather than a single image. TNO developed a sophisticated approach to merge the many images - all 600 of them. The photos were taken automatically using a modern consumer camera and a powerful 400 mm lens. The camera was positioned automatically using a computer-controlled pan-tilt unit. Each of the 600 photos overlaps, an arrangement that ensured very accurate positioning and enabled us to stitch the images automatically into one giant image of 78,797 by 31,565 pixels.
Posted by the Flea at 08:03 AM | TrackBack (0)

Plastic turkey

If my comments were working I would encourage people to come up with the best plastic turkey caption.

Posted by the Flea at 12:17 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 25, 2004

Olympia

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Alexander is beginning to sound like mandatory viewing. John Podhoretz says "Angelina Jolie plays Alexander's mother like she was Natasha from the Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoons" (via Instapundit) while ideofact quotes the following from a Washington Post review.

Then there's Angelina Jolie as Mom. Really, words fail me here. But let's try: Give this young woman the hands-down award for best impression of Bela Lugosi while hampered by a 38-inch bust line. Though everyone else in the picture speaks in some variation of a British accent, poor Jolie has been given the Transylvanian throat-sucker's throaty, sibilant vowels, as well as a wardrobe of snakes. She represents the spirit of kitsch that fills the movie, and with all her crazed posturing and slinking, it's more of a silent movie performance than one from the sound era. Theda Bara, call your agent.

Theda Bara... oh yes!

Posted by the Flea at 09:17 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Male Objectifiction Week™

You have asked for it... nay, demanded it! Next week is Male Objectification Week at the Flea™. I may consider nominations but keep in mind my arrogant silencing of debate and unilateral blogging choices mean I may threaten your job, or worse... not link to you, if you annoy me. So don't suggest anyone who may make me feel bad about myself!

Posted by the Flea at 09:15 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

Scenesters

Scenesters! Somewhat ironic given recent bloggish events and evident ideas about my political leanings is the fact I dated an incarnation of Ultra P.C. Girl on and off for ten years. And I have had arguably more than my fair share of feminist poetry recited to me.

I am riper than an organically grown banana from the co-op!
Posted by the Flea at 09:13 AM | TrackBack (0)

Rodeohead

Rodeohead offers a bluegrass Radiohead medley.

Posted by the Flea at 09:09 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Paperbaghead

Paperbaghead: have you spotted him yet?

He is already spotted on the slopes of the French Alpes, on one of Turkey's hot beaches and he is even spotted under the shower! So if you spot him, take a picture immediatly and send it to us. Paperbaghead, its star is rising and a new legend will be born!!
Posted by the Flea at 09:08 AM | TrackBack (0)

Nadsat

This Nadsat dictionary should come in handy if my TBS swearing-substitution plan does not work out.

Posted by the Flea at 09:02 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Booyakasha

Ali G delivers the 2004 Harvard University commencement speech. This cannot possibly be true, can it?

You iz de elite, u will be tomorrow's captains of industry. Sittin infront of me is probly da next Bill Gates, Donald Trump...or even Ronald Mcdonald. And even if you can't all be Ronald himself, most of you iz probably McDonald's Team Leader material. By da way, if any of u ever gets to do business wiv Sir Ronald, a word of hadvice - don't mention de size of his feet....him iz well sensitive about it. Me mate Dave hactually met him, and he said dat even tho him may seem like he's always smiling, dere's a sadness in de eyes...coz of dem feet. All de money in de world - and science still can't do nothing. Maybe dat's something dat some of u M.I.T. nerds can fink about innit.
Posted by the Flea at 08:57 AM | TrackBack (0)

Snarky

You Are a Snarky Blogger!

You've got a razor sharp wit that bloggers are secretly scared of. And that's why they read your posts as often as they can!
What kind of blogger are you?

Via The Monger who is also snarky.

Posted by the Flea at 08:55 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (1)

November 24, 2004

MiniKiss: Calling Dr. Love

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 08:31 AM | TrackBack (0)

Seagulls

Bombs Away! confirms my suspicions about the seagull's view of a day at the beach.

Posted by the Flea at 08:29 AM | TrackBack (0)

Bat Boy

How is it only now I learn of the existence of Bat Boy: The Musical? (via Ravishing Light, who has "near-memorized the original cast recording" and reports a movie version is on the way).

Ripped from the headlines of The Weekly World News, BAT BOY THE MUSICAL is a classic love story with a serious bite.
Posted by the Flea at 08:27 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Do you know your place?

The Guardian offers a "quick quiz to see if you are yob or snob."

Posted by the Flea at 08:21 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

North Carolina Moonshine

For all your moonshine needs. And don't miss "Kentucky Moonshiner" by George Tucker.

Actually, when you get right down to it, the actual way to drink moonshine isn't really that different from the way you drink anything else.

Well, maybe you take smaller sips.
Posted by the Flea at 08:20 AM | TrackBack (0)

Philosopher’s stone

The scienticians at Oh My God It Burns! conduct some practical alchemy (via Ookii Ne).

Our theory is that a simple brita water filter can be used to make bad vodka, into good. In our case this meant turning a Vladimir™, into a Ketel One™. At $11.09 for 1.75 liter (Ketel is 11.99 for the 350 ml), Vladimir is a steal. It is, however, painful to drink, has a repugnant aftertaste, posesses a bouquet reminiscent of rubbing alcohol. Our working theory was that these terrible qualities were caused by a lack of proper filtration, and that running our Vlad through a charcoal filter would remove some of the impurities causing these odors and flavors.
Posted by the Flea at 08:19 AM | TrackBack (0)

Laws of War

The Castle hosts images from a presentation by the 1rst Marine Expeditionary Force Effects Exploitation Team.

What did we really find in Fallujah? The stuff that has been hinted about, but not covered in the MSM in serious ways, because somehow, it isn't news?
Posted by the Flea at 08:15 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 23, 2004

Edward Hopper: Gas

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As the car slips along a winding road through the woods at dusk, its powerful headlamps momentarily light up whole sections of meadow and tree turnks, so brightly that the texture of the bark and individual stalks of grass can be made out in a clinical white light better suited to a hospital ward than woodland, and then dip them back into the undifferentiated murkiness as the car rounds the corner and the beams turn their attention to another patch of slumbering ground.

There are few other cars on the road, only an occasional set of lights moving in the opposite direction, away from the night. The car's instrument panel casts a purple glow over the darkened interior. Suddenly, in a clearing ahead, a floodlit expanse appears: a petrol station, the last before the road heads off into the longest, densest stretch of forest and night completes its hold over the land - Gas (1940)

- Alain de Botton, "The Art of Travel"
Posted by the Flea at 06:10 AM | TrackBack (1)

Luke Vibert: iloveacid

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 06:09 AM | TrackBack (0)

Ken's New Specs

Ken's New Specs makes me far too happy.

Posted by the Flea at 06:08 AM | TrackBack (0)

Classification

I used to date someone whose father organized his library by the colour of spines.

Posted by the Flea at 06:07 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Les Fleurs du Mal

The collecting mania that underpins much of the posting here at the Flea takes me to a number of stores on a semi-regular basis. One of these is out-of-neighbourhood so is visited less semi-regularly than others. This place is a treat because it also sells cds and the staff tend to play material I have never heard of and which rocks and subsequently I find something new and feel cool, connected, etc. and so forth.

The time before last I first heard The Streets and found a Starlost novelization with a faux-mirror cover. Sweet. This latest visit was even better. Junior Boys' Last Exit is stripped down electro-pop that lets me imagine I am living in Red Hook, skinny enough to wear a 70s rancher-style corduroy fleece coat and dating, or at least futilely pining after, Chloe Sevigny.

Junior Boys defy any easy equation, joining a long tradition of sonically rich pop that unites emotionally charged songcraft with experimental process, like New Order and the Beach Boys before them.

Great stuff and another discovery I owe to this bookstore. It was, therefore, with mixed feelings that I purchased a dramatically underpriced copy of the Sylvan Press 1947 limited-edition of Baudelaire's Flowers of Evil illustrated by Patrick Beresford Egan. A bit of an ethical quandrary... are we obligated to tell booksellers how much more they could get for something on eBay?

Posted by the Flea at 06:06 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

George Lucas Usenet Archive

The story behind the George Lucas Usenet Archive reminds me of Dr. Shackleford's recent devotional.

This morning, as I was riding the bus to work, I thought of all that I had to be grateful for thanks to the strange and wondrous genius of George Walton Lucas. Could it be that my very life was a gift from George? As I realized how he had touched me, I wept loudly, ignoring the stares and words of derision from my fellow commuters.

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I sobbed like a girl--as I felt the pure joy of what he had given. The feeling stayed with me through the long day. My supervisor suggested emergency trauma therapy. He thought I was in the midst of an hysterical fit, or that I had perhaps gone insane.

If you are reading these words, you too have probably been moved as I was moved. However, my admiration and love for George Lucas is better than yours. It's something different, something golden, and sometimes I can't stand how people like you think.
Posted by the Flea at 06:04 AM | TrackBack (1)

November 22, 2004

Alexander

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Outraged Greeks firing off legal notices at Alexander the Great's depiction as a world conquering bisexual need to read some history. First off, there is Hephaestion. I do not expect an Hollywood epic to show Alexander's relationship with his life-long companion in any terms except those meant to sell tickets but it is a bit much to be lectured on the subject by gay-bashing Greek nationalists. Or, for that matter, or by its "radical" director whose depictions of gay men in JFK were cringe-worthy for their camp, stereotyping bigotry. Such is the tolerance of the left. Second, and arguably more important, Alexander was Macedonian. All too many Greeks still find difficulty with this bit of geography.

And then... Classical Values comments.

While there isn't much serious debate about the homosexuality, bisexuality -- whatever modern term we might use -- of Alexander the Great, Stone has apparently presented him according to the dictates of modern American stereotypes. A big mistake in terms of historical accuracy, but entirely consistent for Oliver Stone, whose films are about as concerned with accuracy as Michael Moore's.

And then... Alexander-media continues at Classical Values!

Posted by the Flea at 07:57 AM | Comments (9) | TrackBack (1)

Call On Me (revised)

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.*

*And just ignore those sidebars. Aieeee... my eyes!

Posted by the Flea at 07:53 AM | TrackBack (0)

Right

It is not only what you have a right to say.
It is if what you have to say is right.

/Flea-doing-Sphinx-impression

More maxims... this week at the Flea!

Posted by the Flea at 07:51 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Sky prawns

Cooking with Sky Prawns offers more than twenty locust-based recipes as part of a New South Wales government response to a plague of the flying beasties.

Dishes include locust dumplings, chocolate-covered locusts, locust-flavoured popcorn and "Coonabarabran stir fry", named after one of the towns in New South Wales that has been most affected by the plague.
Posted by the Flea at 07:50 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Fatpie

Presented for your ethnographic interest: Do chavs like fatpie?*

*nsfw due to language, assuming you can make out what he is saying or have the remotest idea what he is talking about.

Posted by the Flea at 07:49 AM | TrackBack (0)

650 XUV

Another potential Fleamobile presents itself.

Posted by the Flea at 07:47 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Neocolonialism

Following the refusal of an imam to shake the polluting hand of Dutch immigration secretary Rita Verdonk, Zacht Ei asks an important question about what it really means to respect people from different cultures.

Let's say that someone from another country tells you the Sun revolves around the Earth. Would you correct him, or just snigger behind his back? Which course of action would show the most respect for the person you're having a conversation with?
Posted by the Flea at 07:41 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Quite Pisces

You are 87% Pisces

How much do you match your zodiac sign?

While Abraca-Pocus! is mostly Leo!

Posted by the Flea at 07:37 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0)

November 20, 2004

Citroën

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance (via Dean's World).

Posted by the Flea at 09:51 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 19, 2004

Free ice cream

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Look, it's Scarlett Johansson! What was I thinking? Oh, that's it... I was feeling the onset of the testy post that arrives when bloggers reach a critical mass of traffic. You know, when you have 50,000 people visit your blog in a month some of whom were presumably entertained in some way, attract precisely zero dollars in donations (just as the month before) and then yet another ingrate decides s/he has the right to direct your editorial policy while using your comment feature to advertise their blog. It is the testy post that results from putting a lot of work into something, having that work shat upon from a great height and which is the provisional alternative to deciding to call it a day. Seriously.

James Lileks famously reminded Glenn Reynolds that Instapundit is not a public utility. True. Yet this simple fact seems to escape people raised in a culture of complaint. Here are some thoughts on etiquette that may prove useful to bloggers getting stick from that tiny minority of extre... or rather, of readers with bad manners.

A Small Victory's Quarterly Notice About Owing You Something, INDC Journal's A Plea for Civility and La Shawn Barber's Corner's Comment Policy make useful interventions. But I cede the floor to Stardate 20040827.2353 posted at USS Clueless and the following passage in particular.

I've learned something interesting: if you give away ice cream, eventually a lot of people will complain about the flavors, and others will complain that you aren't also giving away syrup and whipped cream and nuts.

Too true. Ghost of a flea is a blog written and published at my time and expense for reasons I am not certain I can properly articulate. Most of the time it is a labour of love but it remains labour nonetheless. If you spot something here and choose to write about it please have the common courtesy to offer a link in recognition of my work. If you are an argumentative soul regularly outraged at my ramblings I suggest you vent your feelings at your own expense elsewhere. And if you find all this free ice cream is not to your taste please feel free to read something else or, better yet, write something more interesting. I am certain the world will beat a path to your door and bask in your fascinating thoughts. When I shut down the Flea it will give people something else to read and if you are especially lucky you can pay for the bandwidth they will use to tell you how boring your work is.

And then... I would probably find it difficult to quit for the same reason Occam's Carbuncle discovered with a week's hiatus.

When I suspended posting last Friday, it was with a view to deciding whether there was any purpose to continuing this weblog. After spending a week as a spectator in the blogosphere once more, it is my considered opinion that my feeble efforts here are entirely without merit or consequence. Naturally, therefore, I will be resuming posting. I return not so much refreshed as nearing dangerous levels of repressed bile saturation.

And then... My editorial continues with thoughts on sexism, freedom of speech and Kylie Minogue's perfect bottom.

And then... And then there is Theresa Zolner who posted a picture of a bare-breasted woman suckling a dog the same week she attacked the Flea for posting pictures of Kylie Minogue. This strikes me as a grotesque distortion of taste and a violation of elementary sense. While I am delighted to say I cannot fathom Theresa Zolner's reason for her behaviour, I can find no other explanation than an attention-seeking sublimation of her feelings at having been banned from my comments section after leaving one too many comments in poor taste. Taste is a difficult thing to define but I can only prefer Australian pop singers over Theresa Zolner's bestial image. I can't speak for Theresa Zolner's patients - let alone Theresa Zolner's Christian ethics - but I would never show photos such as the one she posted to any of my students. I imagine they have all seen pictures of Kylie Minogue. While Theresa Zolner has since posted a rambling apologia for her decision to post an image of a bare-breasted woman suckling a dog, I believe the image is inherently grotesque, aesthetically indefensible and speaks volumes about her judgement in posting it. Her subsequent attacks on the Flea are as difficult to take seriously as the remainder of her rhetoric.

Theresa Zolner has repeatedly claimed to like the Flea barring the Kylie pics. Perhaps this accounts for her hyperventilating attack on my writing, my morality and my professionalism for the affront of barring her noxious comments from appearing here. As for myself, I was blissfully unfamiliar with Theresa Zolner beyond her trollish comments and what little I have seen since leaves an unpleasant taste. In fact, if not for Theresa Zolner's contribution to Canadian culture I would have never imagined anyone would breast-feed a dog let alone publish a picture of it to their "conservative" weblog. Such is the miracle of liberty. Australian pop singers or bare-breasted women suckling dogs: your choice.

I would not normally reward a troll for spamming my comments section let alone for complaining about it once they were barred. But this one case may as well stand as an example to anyone writing a successful blog for the kind of petty, parasitic nonsense that arises as a side-effect. Anyone wondering why Theresa Zolner is only one of many people banned from commenting at this blog only has to look at that photograph to understand the sort of poor judgement and poor taste I will not tolerate in this forum. That from self-appointed judges of my publication, or indeed of Kylie Minogue, such Theresa Zolner or from anyone else. Healer, heal thyself.

Posted by the Flea at 09:32 PM | Comments (25) | TrackBack (10)

I Believe In You

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The Flea's adamantine commitment to the latest in Kylie-media coverage meant recent plastic surgery charges had to be investigated immediately. It is with some hesitance that I point Flea-readers to the video for "I Believe In You", Kylie's Scissor Sisters single. Behold the slightly troubling wonder that is our transhuman future!

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One British commentator has even described her appearance in I Believe In You as "eerie". In the video of the single, recorded with camp rock group Scissor Sisters, the 36-year-old former Neighbours star gyrates inside a neon globe in a series of revealing outfits.

Nothing different there, but her lips look distinctly larger than usual. Sparkly make-up on her eyebrows completes the strange picture.

Update: To any humourless right-wing anti-sex bigots pretending to be concerned with the objectification of women even as their rhetoric reifies that objectification, some advice. First, read some Judith Butler. Also Donna Haraway and Catherine Walby. These are voices of an authentic, engaged contemporary feminism that, in my reading, offers a far more complex understanding of gender and power than a condescending, warmed-up Victorian petticoat paternalism. Second, this is Kylie Minogue gay icon. It is puritanism masquerading as concern, not Kylie Minogue's self-representation, that objectifies women.

Posted by the Flea at 07:01 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Le Tigre: Deceptacon

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 06:53 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (1)

City of Heroes

To see heroes of Paragon City in real life is to see a bleak view of an all cosplay future. Though Ingrid is quite fetching as whoever she is supposed to be.

Posted by the Flea at 06:52 AM | TrackBack (0)

Evil Dead

I do not know what to make of this Variety article claiming another Evil Dead remake is in the works. What is there to add to a remake after Evil Dead II? And has another Ash film been lost with this news?

At least the list of upcoming films suggests a marketing motive behind that Dibbuk Box story that was floating around the internet.

"Spider-Man 2" director Sam Raimi and original producing partners Rob Tapert and Bruce Campbell are reteaming to produce a remake of the cult hit "The Evil Dead" through Ghost House Pictures, the joint venture of Raimi, Tapert and Senator Intl.

Raimi wrote, directed and produced the 1981 "Dead," which tells of five twentysomething friends holed up in a remote cabin who discover a Book of the Dead. When an archaeologist's taped translation of the text and its incantations is replayed, the youths unwittingly summon dormant demons that possess them.

Raimi will not direct the remake, so Ghost House is looking for a helmer to reinvent the franchise before a script is written.
Posted by the Flea at 06:51 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Fish Highway

This Fish Highway is a most sensible idea for the facilitation of fish traffic.

Imagine a means for fish to swim out the top of your aquarium, up to the ceiling, across the room and then down into another tank. That's a fish highway.
Posted by the Flea at 06:47 AM | TrackBack (0)

Wankometer

Ghost of a flea has a Wank factor of 0.44. This level is classified as low.

Posted by the Flea at 06:41 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (1)

Lightsaber

This lightsaber test somehow missed the obvious fact I would have a purple lightsaber due to purple lightsabers kicking ass (via The Jawa Report).

Green
Green is your Lightsaber's color.

Green is the color of nature. It symbolizes growth, harmony, and freshness. Green has strong emotional correspondence with safety. Green is also commonly associated with wealth and happiness, so someone with a green lightsaber like yourself is a fortunate soul.


What Colored Lightsaber Would You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

Posted by the Flea at 06:33 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 18, 2004

Tomato McGrand

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I demand the immediate introduction of the Tomato McGrand to North American McDonald's!

Posted by the Flea at 05:58 AM | TrackBack (0)

Grill Skill

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 05:57 AM | TrackBack (2)

Dulce de Leche

Gothamist is on about a variety of dulce de leche products. That is arequipe, manjar, doce de leite or cajeta as you prefer. What I cannot figure out is how I have never tried this Häagen-Dazs flavour.

Posted by the Flea at 05:54 AM | TrackBack (0)

TBS

I have decided to replace all my swearing with substitute words used on TBS (a proud Flea advertiser!). There was a great substitution for "rat's ass" in a movie they showed the other day. Something like, "I don't give a razzmatazz!" Having failed to find a website that could be my guide to this new life path, I am asking Flea-readers for other examples of TBS curse-word substitutes.

Posted by the Flea at 05:51 AM | Comments (9) | TrackBack (0)

Winter/spring

Patrick Stewart has a new girlfriend. Why... it makes me feel like... singing!

'Star Trek' actor Patrick Stewart has appeared in public for the first time with girlfriend Lisa Dillon - who is 39 years his junior.

The Hollywood actor, 64, and Dillon, 25, have been together for almost a year, but previously kept their relationship a secret, due to concerns over people's attitudes to their age gap.
Posted by the Flea at 05:49 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

U.S. Presidents

Some little known facts about United States presidents. I had my suspicions about William Henry Harrison.

Posted by the Flea at 05:46 AM | TrackBack (0)

Two Maps

An electoral map of the United States shows voting behaviour may be correlated with population density (via Instapundit). There is room for informed reflection on this sort of political geography but I am left with little hope this will put an end to the bigoted slave state comparison maps posted by a legion of sore losers.

The now familiar map of the United States, separated into red and blue states, makes the point, graphically, that the coastal population centers tend to vote Democratic while fly-over country leans Republican.

Unfortunately, the map's binary either/or electoral college nature overestimates the philosophical division within the country while failing to show the extraordinary degree to which Americans' voting behavior reflects the degree to which their own neighborhoods are more or less crowded.
Posted by the Flea at 05:43 AM | TrackBack (0)

Kristallnacht observance II

Dear Royal Norwegian Embassy to the United States,

I sent the following email to the Norwegian Embassy in Ottawa, Canada on Friday, 12 November. As yet I have received no acknowledgement of my letter or a reply to the questions I posed. I hope you might direct me to the appropriate representative of the Norwegian government who could address my concerns.

Thank you,

www.ghostofaflea.com

Posted by the Flea at 05:41 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 17, 2004

Elektra

Elektra.jpg

Jennifer Garner stars as Elektra. Oh yes.

Following her big screen debut in 'Daredevil,' the sultry sai-wielding siren returns to kick some serious ninja butt.
Posted by the Flea at 07:58 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (0)

Brad Superstar

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 07:57 AM | TrackBack (0)

Beer.com

Beer.com hosts a new feature inspired by the Subservient Chicken. I cannot believe she actually did one of the things I suggested.

Posted by the Flea at 07:51 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

Titanic

This may be another post where I will be advised to lighten up but this Titanic Adventure Slide strikes me to be in very poor taste.

Posted by the Flea at 07:44 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Protect your base

Protect Your Base is an inventive, if somewhat peculiar, Missile Command style webgame.

Posted by the Flea at 07:41 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 16, 2004

Sue Storm

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A September Flea-post pointed to a head shot of Jessica Alba with her Sue Storm on. This is the full image (the rest of the Fantastic Four are here for those with an academic interest in these matters). More Jessica Alba imagery may be found in these candid photos from a break from filming. And more good news... Tim Robbins was reportedly considered and rejected for the role of Dr. Doom. I have no idea who Julian McMahon might be but he is Oscar-worthy in comparison. We dodged a bullet there.

Posted by the Flea at 06:07 AM | Comments (13) | TrackBack (0)

Superhero name

This Incredibles test thinks my superhero name is Super Dyno-Man and my special ability is Agility when it is in fact Ghost of a flea and typing (via Da Goddess).

So you want to be a superhero, eh? Well, what's your superhero name? And power? And do you have an ID card to prove you're a bonafide superhero? And what about an emblem to put on your superhero uniform?
Posted by the Flea at 06:05 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Lenses

9mm Special Effects specializes in theatrical and sfx contact lenses for all your speciality contact lens needs.

The artist for 9mm Special Effects, Kevin Carter, has been designing theatrical and therapeutic contacts since 1994. He started the hand painted contact lens departments of both Adventure In Colors and Crystal Reflections before moving on to create his own company.

He has designed lenses for the Johns Hopkins Hospital, The Mayo Clinic, The Blair Witch Project 2: Book of Shadows, Lucas Films, Alice In Chains, Rob Zombie, Maya Hyena, Temple of Rain, Blues Traveler, Eminem, Coors Light, Pluto Nash and many more.
Posted by the Flea at 06:03 AM | TrackBack (0)

Bayeux Tapestry

Dodgeblogium uncovers an anti-war message in the Bayeux Tapestry.

Posted by the Flea at 05:58 AM | TrackBack (0)

Insults

Old English insults (for use at Hastings).

Firstly, the battle cries actually used (according to an eyewitness) at Hastings: “GOD AELMIHTIG!”
Posted by the Flea at 05:57 AM | TrackBack (0)

English Roses

Raymi the Minx reviews Madonna's The English Roses.

i suggest you go to a bookstore and read it for free like i did. madonna wrote it, she didn't draw it. well maybe she did. anyway.
Posted by the Flea at 05:55 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

November 15, 2004

Lindsay Lohan: Rumors

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 08:37 AM | Comments (11) | TrackBack (0)

Christie's

Christie's Film & Entertainment Sale 5515 is to feature an Imperial Stormtrooper helmet (a snip at an estimated £5,000-7,000) and the Moon Buggy from Diamonds Are Forever. A new Flea-mobile for only £20,000-30,000! (via Londonist).

Posted by the Flea at 08:31 AM | TrackBack (1)

Rasterbator

The Rasterbator answers my not entirely hypothetical office decor needs. Now to think of an image to Rasterbate.

The Rasterbator is a web service which creates huge, rasterized images from any picture. The rasterized images can be printed and assembled into extremely cool looking posters up to 20 meters in size.
Posted by the Flea at 08:27 AM | TrackBack (0)

Glib, silly people

Glenn Reynolds calls himself a Column A guy "but with more column-B characteristics than most." I like to believe the same about myself.

Posted by the Flea at 08:24 AM | TrackBack (0)

Blackwater

Knowledge Is Power has an image of graffiti left at a bridge crossing the Euphrates at Fallujah.

Posted by the Flea at 08:21 AM | TrackBack (0)

Marine Corps answering machine

Thank you for calling the US Marine Corps.

Posted by the Flea at 08:19 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Most Annoying Canadian

Autonomous Source moves into the second round of voting for Most Annoying Canadian!

The second round has begun, as you can see from the new poll on the right. It was difficult to whittle down the contestants to just ten, but I have. I think they reflect the diversity of this vast and annoying land. We've got two ex-Prime Ministers, one to appeal to both sides of the political spectrum, a couple of annoying seperatists who would hate to be considered 'Canadians', a rock-throwing jackass and his intellectual facilitator, and representatives from the rabidly anti-American press, the cultural elite, and the reactionary labour movement. And don't think the Canadian Tire guy is just a joke contestant.

Vote early, vote often in the sidebar at the Autonomous Source main page!

Posted by the Flea at 08:14 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 13, 2004

Macho

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 10:04 AM | TrackBack (0)

After You

By all means, After You.

Posted by the Flea at 10:03 AM | TrackBack (1)

Trebuchet

A custom trebuchet webgame.

Posted by the Flea at 09:57 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Lars Porsena

The University of Florence' Giuseppe Centauro believes he can prove Chiusi is the cite of ancient Clusium, the largest city of pre-Roman Italy and resting place of its Etruscan king, Lars Porsena. Now, if only someone had told me earlier that archaeology bears little resemblance to Indiana Jones movies (or spying to James Bond).

Lars Porsena's place in history was ensured by his interference in the revolution that made Rome a republic. The last Roman king, Lucius Tarquinius, nicknamed “Superbus” because of his arrogance, was Etruscan. When he was deposed by the revolutionaries, he appealed to Porsena for help. There are conflicting accounts of whether Porsena succeeded in capturing and ruling Rome, or was forced to make peace with the revolutionaries. Either way, most of those accounts agree that he was eventually buried in a fabulous tomb near his home city of Camars, or Clusium as the Romans called it.
Posted by the Flea at 09:54 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Queen Anne's Revenge

Queen Anne's Revenge is probably the coolest name for a ship, like, ever. Nails thought to have been used for "sacrificial planking" have been recovered from Blackbeard's ship.

The nails came from a concretion attached to one of the cannons retrieved from the shipwreck site. They could have been on board when the ship was taken or the pirates may have kept them there for trade purposes or for use in minor repairs, said David Moore, museum nautical archaeologist and Blackbeard historian.

"I doubt very seriously that pirates would have gotten into major repairs," Moore said. "They would have just gone out and captured another ship."

The nails appear similar to those that would have been used to attach sacrificial planking to the hull of the ship, Moore said. Sacrificial planking was an outside layer of wood that protected the ship from boring worms.
Posted by the Flea at 09:48 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 12, 2004

LK Legs

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Kylie Minogue launches a new LoveKylie lingerie line: LK Legs.

Models showed off the latest collection from her best-selling LK line, including fabulous fishnets and peek-a-boo suspenders. "LK Legs are for all women, whether it's the sexy secretary or screen icon look you're adopting," observed the singer.
Posted by the Flea at 08:43 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Beastie Boys, "Intergalactic"

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 08:41 AM | TrackBack (0)

Freddy vs. Jason

The re-enactment bunnies present Freddy vs. Jason (in 30 seconds).

Posted by the Flea at 08:38 AM | TrackBack (1)

Natural 20!

Dungeon Majesty may be the saddest thing I have ever linked to. Also, how do I meet these women?

Posted by the Flea at 08:37 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (1)

Snail Shell System

Here's a plan. Let's abandon heat, lighting and indoor plumbing in favour of temporary communities of plastic snail shells (paddle included).

The SNAIL SHELL SYSTEM is a low cost system that enables persons to move around, change their whereabouts and live in various environments. One unit supplies space for one person. It is mobile both on land and water. One person can move it slowly, either by pushing it like a wheel, walking inside it or on top of it.
Posted by the Flea at 08:33 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Tumbleweed Tiny House Company

The Tumbleweed Tiny House Company offers a much more sensible alternative for your tiny housing needs.

My name is Jay Shafer, and I live in a house smaller than some people’s bathrooms. I call my tiny home Tumbleweed. My decision to inhabit just 100 square feet arose from some concerns I had about the impact a larger house would have on the environment, and because I just do not want to maintain a lot of unused or unusable space. Tumbleweed meets all of my domestic needs without demanding much in return. The simple, slower lifestyle my home affords is a luxury for which I am supremely grateful.
Posted by the Flea at 08:31 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 11, 2004

Remembrance

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In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders Fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

- Lieutenant-Colonel John McCrae, 1915

Update: dustmybroom.com has some moving words and a round-up of Red Ensign remembrance posts.

Posted by the Flea at 06:14 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

Reminder

Now the "left" has claimed Afghanistan as a just war it is worth remembering how the Guardian remembered November 11, 2001 scant weeks following the incineration of British citizens in New York.

As the generation of the first world war loses its last members, another conflict threatens. But comparisons between now and 1914 are not (yet) applicable
Posted by the Flea at 06:11 AM | TrackBack (0)

Learn Yiddish with Dick and Jane

See Jane. See Jane Schlep. Schlep, Jane, schlep.

Posted by the Flea at 06:07 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (1)

Subtle Safety™

The Subtle Safety™ jewelry-line is "a reminder to make safe choices."

The Subtle Safety™ ring is a expression of confidence. Orange whistles are garish and weapons can easily be turned against you. Subtle Safety jewelry is worn and available right where you need it.
Posted by the Flea at 06:04 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (1)

Democracy

Taiwanese democracy always looks like it is more interactive than the Canadian version.

Posted by the Flea at 05:59 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

National Bolshevik Party

I ran across an image of a street protestor from the National Bolshevik Party. Their website is easy to google but I will not provide a direct link to them and upon reflection decided I would not post the image either. Suffice to say that Stalinism and Hitlerism are the same disease.

Posted by the Flea at 05:57 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

November 10, 2004

Royal Enfield in Paradise

This Ride Now adventure looks like heaven. Oh yes.

Deep in the Indian Himalyas lies a land that was crafted and set upon this Earth with quite a different purpose in the scheme of nature. Not here the lush jungles and fertile valleys to provide bounty for mankind. Rather, it was built to impress man, bowl him over with its magnitude, and remind him what an insignificant twit he really is.

Sounds and looks rather like the Plateau of Leng. A Royal Enfield Bullet is just the ticket for fleeing Mythos entities!

Posted by the Flea at 07:43 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Dolmette

The Dolmette is a massively multi-chainsaw powered motorcycle.

What makes the Dolmette unique in engineering terms is its 24-cylinder 2-stroke power plant. Nothing quite like it has been seen before. The combined power of 24 DOLMAR chainsaw engines is fed into to a 5-speed Harley-Davidson transmission by a series of twelve toothed belts.
Posted by the Flea at 07:42 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

London 2012

The London 2012 Olympic bid has been unveiled on "the internet" (via Londonist). I like the architecture but loathe the Olympics.

The dramatic designs for the 500-acre Olympic Park in east London have been inspired by the human form and the athletes who will compete in the Games. Plans for the main Olympic Stadium include a striking roof, which wraps itself around the venue like muscles supporting the human body.

Alejandro Zaero-Pollo, chief designer on the project at Foreign Office Architects, said: "We are trying to make the building communicate the idea of physical strength, sport and movement - this is what communicates the conceptual backbone of all the buildings."
Posted by the Flea at 07:41 AM | TrackBack (0)

Mexican Coke

This Mexican Coke story explains what happened to the Coke I remember from when I was a kid (via ***Dave).

Taste is the main reason why his discriminating shoppers buy Mexican Coke -- they say the cane sugar sweetener used in Mexican Coke has a sweeter, cleaner flavor than the high-fructose corn syrup in the American version. Many are willing to pay $1.10 per 12-ounce bottle for the imports, even with cans of American Coke sitting nearby for 49 cents each.
Posted by the Flea at 07:39 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 09, 2004

Travel iron

traveliron.jpg

This is where I need someone to give up James Lileks' email address to me. I found this travel iron at a thrift store and think it is one of the most beautiful objects I own. But can I find out anything about it? No. Is there a web museum of historic irons? Not that I can find. Great iron too (and for any parental units reading: the cord is in fine condition).

The base of the iron reveals it to be a General Electric Cat. No. 12F38 (500 Watts 115 Volts) made in the U.S. of A. and I am fully assuming it has some sweet model name such as the GE Interceptor or possibly GE Ironmaster. Some googling shows my model resembles this General Electric MIB F-49 travel iron... no... wait for it... once again I am astonished at the knowledge to be found on "the internet". Iron.com features a piece on streamlined irons. The Winpower Select Heat looks like it was first deployed against the Merrimac in the War Between The States and I am pretty sure the Waverly Tool Co. Petipoint was first announced by an Orson Welles radio program as part of the Martian invasion. These irons kick my iron's ass.

Just as streamlining was enabled by new technology, so was its demise. The development of a steam iron that boiled one drop of water at a time, made the steam iron practical and very popular. Thus, the need to store water brought on larger and more squared off bases, which were now functioned as tanks. And the word 'tank' can be used to see what happened to the sleek beauties of the thirties and forties.
Posted by the Flea at 06:33 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

Ironing

WARNING: SHOCKING NUDITY!

My ironing theme continues with this short film of a bare-breasted Luba Hegre doing some... uhh... ironing. This is an image that is ironed - ironed - into my memory. That bare-breasted part may signal difficulties with workplace viewing.

Posted by the Flea at 06:31 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Underwater ironing

You may think you have time-wasting hobbies. Obviously, you have yet to consider underwater ironing.

Posted by the Flea at 06:28 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Ghost rider robot

This Ghost Rider Robot brings the bright future of metallic, skeletal feet stomping on human skulls one step closer. Thanks, DARPA!

Posted by the Flea at 06:23 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Brain in a dish

The brain in a dish experiment is such a bad idea. Skeletal metal foot meet human skull. Human skull, skeletal metal foot.

A Florida scientist has developed a "brain" in a glass dish that is capable of flying a virtual fighter plane and could enhance medical understanding of neural disorders such as epilepsy. The "living computer" was grown from 25,000 neurons extracted from a rat's brain and arranged over a grid of 60 electrodes in a Petri dish.
Posted by the Flea at 06:22 AM | TrackBack (0)

20Q.net

20Q.net is an AI that can supposedly guess any object you are thinking of with twenty questions. My object was a Welsh flag. It did not quite get to the Welsh part but it did guess it was a flag by question 19 even though the program believed I was wrong to say flags are not straight and would not be found in an office. Impressive.

20Q.net is an experiment in artificial intelligence. The program is very simple but its behavior is complex. Everything that it knows and all questions that it asks were entered by people playing this game. 20Q.net is a learning system; the more it is played, the smarter it gets.

I tried again with a dragon. The AI got that one by question 11. Seriously impressive.

Posted by the Flea at 06:21 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

November 08, 2004

Maarten van Roozen

Part of me remains convinced I can speech Dutch despite watching this Maarten van Roozen video and not having the vaguest idea what he is singing about. It's the Netherlands and bicycles are featured prominently.

And then... That would be speak Dutch. Hey, I was posting midterm results and got distracted!

Posted by the Flea at 10:33 AM | TrackBack (0)

F-15

Get that F-15 movin! Does this count as a Flea-dance?

Posted by the Flea at 10:27 AM | TrackBack (0)

Avril

Avril Lavigne on stage in Philadelphia. In a Hooters outfit.*

*To Flea-readers who were promised extreme Monday morning cheesecake: this is not it! That got bumped to tomorrow along with the lead. To everybody else: extreme cheesecake warning for Tuesday!

Posted by the Flea at 10:23 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

Capture the Map

The Presurfer describes a Google-driven capture the map game. Unfortunately, I am having the same technical problem.

Capture the Map is a two player strategic game using the Google search engine. The first 9 results of a search term will be localized by longitude and latitude. These results will be placed as pins on the world map and thus capture predefined squares.

By hitting a captured square with your pin, the other pin will be removed from the map and has to be placed again. The square is captured by you. You can save your captured squares if you capture 3 per 3 squares on the map.

Looks like an interesting game. There's just one thing, I can't seem to get it to work. Am I doing something wrong?
Posted by the Flea at 10:11 AM | TrackBack (0)

Chicoutimi

CTV reports controversy as enquiries into the recent tragedy aboard HMCS Chicoutimi proceed.

A former Canadian submarine commander is looking with a skeptical eye at a British newspaper's report that claims human error was behind the Oct. 5 fire on HMCS Chicoutimi.

"It certainly seems to me this British source is trying to put the blame on human error and the submarine crew," Peter Kavanagh told CTV Newsnet on Sunday.

He was commenting on a report in a British newspaper that claims the fire aboard Chicoutimi was caused by crew members mistakenly leaving the sub's hatches open. The source told The Mail on Sunday: "This looks like a simple case of a drill not being carried out. Had a hatch at the bottom of the conning tower been closed, the water would never have got inside."

While CTV's report says the source for this claim "apparently comes from the Canadian Navy's investigation into the fire" more recent CTV television news coverage suggests representatives of the enquiry deny this claim. Is this a leak from the enquiry? A simple recycling of earlier reports regarding open hatches? Or an attempt by some party to deflect blame for the fire and death toward human error and away from the sumbarine's manufacturer or some party to the refitting process?

Posted by the Flea at 10:07 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 06, 2004

Got grok?

The Quotable Heinlein is a valuable resource made possible by "the internet".

Posted by the Flea at 12:37 PM | TrackBack (0)

Carl Lewis and the Electric Storm, "Break It Up"

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.*

*Mental note: reconsider career in music.

Posted by the Flea at 12:35 PM | TrackBack (0)

Salad Fingers

A quest for rusty spoons (via The Jawa Report).

Posted by the Flea at 12:33 PM | TrackBack (0)

Kite

Kite aerial photography by Scott Haefner. Stunning.

Scott Haefner is a photographer and web designer living in the San Francisco Bay area. He primarily shoots outdoor landscapes and scenics, using both film and digital cameras. In January 2002, he began taking kite-lofted aerial photos to gain a new perspective of our world.

At an international kite aerial photography conference in November 2002, Scott was recognized as the “Most Promising New KAPer.”
Posted by the Flea at 12:23 PM | TrackBack (0)

The D'Oh of Blogging

The D'Oh of Blogging
being
Various and Sundry Hints and Alarums For Those New to the Diversion of Blogging
by Ghost of a flea, Esq.

Some time ago I was asked to offer advice to new bloggers. Here are ten belated thoughts.

1. First, read Venomous Kate, Dean Esmay, John Hawkins, Asterisk* and 47 key tips from "the world's best bloggers." I suppose this list makes me a "linker" more than a "thinker"... Follow their advice but follow this advice in particular: do not try to be the Instapundit. We already have one. He's crazy or obsessional or a law professor and you can't out-post him so don't even try. I could not figure how the InstaWife put up with him until I learned she is a director. I dated a director. Those people are even more obsessive than bloggers.

2. Remember: these are the most public words you have ever said. These are words for which you can be held accountable. It may feel like you are writing into the void but the fact is that everyone from your employer to your parents to the people from high school who will laugh if you fail are all part of the potential audience. Keep it in mind. This is along the lines of the advice about wearing clean underwear in case of traffic accidents. There is nothing stranger than the realization people you have never met are reading your work every day let alone the day when someone from your "real" life first mentions reading something on your blog. Creepy.

3. There is only one JD Salinger of the blogosphere and it is not you or me it is Angua. Don't expect to find your voice right away. Pay attention to accidents and treasure them when they happen.

4. Write about what you know and admit it when you don't know something. This is the blogosphere, friends. Your ass is being fact checked, a fact that keeps most people honest. Expect to make mistakes, lose your temper, make an ass of yourself and learn that the ruthless honesty of the blogosphere is matched only by the respect accorded to a sincere expression of d'oh! after any of the above.

5. Some people post irregularly to their blogs and that's fine but readers will only commit to your blog if they know what to expect. Imagine getting a year's subscription to a monthy magazine that decided to change its format half way through the year after taking an unannounced sabbatical for the months of February, May and June. Would you subscribe next year? Almost any format, subject and publishing routine will attract a readership. Find your format and stick to it.

6. Link generously. Most bloggers will find you through their referral logs and great conversations and friendships often start this way. Comment on other people's blogs as another way into the conversation.

7. Copy edit your work. Good spelling and grammar lend weight to your opinions while the converse is also true. And now a frantic check for errors in this post...

8. Flee Blogspot as soon as you can and take the time to create a distinctive graphic for your blog. Many of us look at hundreds of web pages every day and it is important for readers to know what they are reading. Blogging is branding. Let the medium emphasize your message.

9. Do not be afraid to ask for help. I can manage odds and ends of HTML but proper CSS is beyond me. I have special thanks in a permanent place on my sidebar for good reason.

10. Don't expect to make any money from blogging. This is, of course, more of a do-as-I-say-and-not-as-I-do proposition because I fully intend to get rich from blogging and write future posts from a country house in the Cotswolds. Ok, scratch this one. To paraphrase one of the writer's of Will and Grace: embrace your greed and yearning for fame. They will carry you through.

Oh, alright, here is number 11.

11. Enjoy yourself. Not having fun? Take a break or take up a new hobby. Blogging can be a lot of work but this is the best conversation going. You get to meet the very best of people from anywhere you speak the language and further afield than that if they happen to speak yours. I have chatted with publishers and military heroes and even got a cheery note from Kylie Minogue. Sweet!

Posted by the Flea at 12:04 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)

November 05, 2004

Red Siren

RedSiren.gif

I had wondered what happened to Jean-Marc Barr after The Big Blue and Europa (I gave Dogville a miss). I am sorry to say I have found him again in Red Siren, a profoundly stupid film, quasi-pornographic in its portrayal of violence and apparently ignorant of the fact. On the other hand it features Asia Argento.

French cinema has yet to figure out the thriller (that's metà thrillere, better expressed by the phrase "thriller-as-a-second-language"). Director Olivier Megaton has made a French film, filmed in English with a mess of something like ten different euro-accents (don't believe this dubbed trailer). The US police siren background sound effects do not make for an American plot unless perhaps an America as seen through the Matrix. So we find ourselves in a weirdly English-speaking Paris and Portugal: if this is what the French see when they watch action films it is no wonder they are so entirely wrong about the United States. Why am I even writing about this thing... I did mention it features Asia Argento, right?

Posted by the Flea at 08:55 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Kitty Cat Dance

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 08:42 AM | TrackBack (1)

Thrust 2

Thrust 2 is a simple Moonlander-type game.

Posted by the Flea at 08:37 AM | TrackBack (0)

Ice

Some near miraculously beautiful ice photography.

Between February and March of 2003, I took about 1,500 photographs of ice forms. The forms were made by pouring water into household objects like bowls, vases, and balloons, and then freezing or partially freezing them in the fridge.
Posted by the Flea at 08:34 AM | TrackBack (1)

Bonfire 70

All the election kerfuffle meant I missed pointing to the latest Bonfire of the Vanities hosted at Neophyte Pundit.

Posted by the Flea at 08:25 AM | TrackBack (0)

F*Yeah!

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Posted by the Flea at 08:23 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

The color purple

***Dave makes an important point about American party affiliation, the state of the Union and makes a great pun... all in one post!

Posted by the Flea at 08:22 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 04, 2004

Bong-Ra, "Can you digit?"

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.*

*Possibly nsfw due to babes, guns and bikini-carwash content.

Posted by the Flea at 06:11 AM | TrackBack (0)

Ring Two

The trailer for Ring Two looks more promising than the legion of Ringu sequels and prequels.

Posted by the Flea at 06:09 AM | TrackBack (0)

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre in 30 seconds. Re-enacted by bunnies, of course.

Posted by the Flea at 06:08 AM | TrackBack (0)

Vulcan Bomber

This Vulcan Bomber would make a fine addition to the Arsenal of Blogocracy.

Posted by the Flea at 06:07 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Latin

Learn Latin the easy way. By C.J. Cherryh.

I used to teach this subject. I use a method that's a little different than the standard, a method aimed at results, not tradition, and no need to learn grammar at the outset, when you've got enough new things to learn. If you learned by the traditional method you may find this radically different; but trust me.
Posted by the Flea at 06:03 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Pardon me

On the eve of its abolition, Prestoungrange Baronial Court issued pardons to 81 people convictioned under the Witchcraft Act 1735. I do not see an "apology" on offer and wonder how this helps the deceased or the thousands more murdered under a similar pretense.

More than 3500 Scots were executed amid a resurgence in Catholic feeling during the Reformation period that reached a peak under King James VI, later crowned King James I of England. Many were condemned on evidence such as owning a black cat or cursing a neighbour who subsequently fell ill.
Posted by the Flea at 06:01 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Top Gods

Top Gods in the spotlight!

Is there a God of Chocolate? Is there a God of Credit Cards? Is there a God of Laundry? You may just be curious, or you may be looking for a God for some specific purpose. (We recently had someone ask us for Gods of Marriage to invite to their wedding!)

There are Gods of practically everything. Biggie Gods deal with profound subjects such as Creation, Death and Love. But there are plenty of lesser deities who handle more mundane matters. In some cultures, there are Gods for every tree, rock, insect and raindrop.

On the other hand, the Romans were so worried about accidentally missing out obscure deities that they raised statues to Gods they didn't even know about, just to be on the safe side.
Posted by the Flea at 06:00 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

November 03, 2004

An Angel rides

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God preserve the United States. We know the Race is not to the Swift nor the Battle to the Strong. Do you not think an Angel rides in the Whirlwind and directs this Storm?

- John Page to Thomas Jefferson, July 20, 1776 – on the signing of the Declaration of Independence
Posted by the Flea at 12:23 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

I'm So Ronery

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 12:21 PM | TrackBack (0)

Hulk Smash Up

Hulk Smash Up is self-explanatory. Just the thing for post-election jitters.

Posted by the Flea at 12:15 PM | TrackBack (0)

ST-v-SW

Six of one and half a dozen of the other... ST-v-SW answers your Star Trek vs Star Wars questions.

Posted by the Flea at 12:13 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Tolkien Sarcasm

The Tolkien Sarcasm Page provides a valuable service thanks to the wonder of "the internet".

J.R.R. Tolkien, in writing his extraordinary books about Middle-earth, has succeeded in creating a world so finely-detailed and fully-realized that even now, over fifty years after The Lord of the Rings was first published, linguists and scholars still continue their avid research and debates about the world Tolkien has created. The Tolkien Sarcasm Page, one of the oldest bastions of Tolkien humor on the Web, is here to help Middle-earth historians everywhere take a break from those heated arguments about Glorfindel's bloodline and whether or not Thingol was a wise King.
Posted by the Flea at 12:11 PM | TrackBack (0)

Heraldry Game

A diverting Heraldry Game.

The heraldry game is set in the year 1273, a time when things were, well, pretty medieval. You will play the part of 14 year old Robert, second son of Lord Landley. You will use the knowledge of heraldry and blazonry taught to you at great pains (mostly yours) by your father’s herald to identify other characters and know them for friend or foe. Your fate will lie in your ability to correctly identify them as the story unfolds; if you fail the consequences may be dire as these are harsh and brutal times.
Posted by the Flea at 12:08 PM | TrackBack (0)

What he said

I am going to include the word "multiculturalism" in this post for easy-to-find future googling. For the record, I agree with everything The Tiger in Winter has to say about racism and immigration policy. I am a child of immigrants myself.

I do not like official multiculturalism. I think that encouraging the formation of "community" groups is divisive, as is treating someone as part of a given "community" because of a shared ethnic background. I think that such programmes are patronizing at best, blatantly racist at worst.

I do not get along with racists. For one thing, they get a bad first impression of me, given that I'm brown. For another, I get a bad first (second, third, etc.) impression of them, given that they are idiots.
Posted by the Flea at 12:05 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

November 02, 2004

Teddy Bear's Picnic

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Posted by the Flea at 06:12 AM | TrackBack (0)

Comment malfunction

I am not yet certain whether yesterday's comment malfunction was a server glitch or an MT hiccup but comments once again appear to be working. Sorry about that. Funny how one misses this stuff when it is not available.

Flea-readers may have noticed a massive increase in comment spam these last two weeks. I am Blacklisting left and right but have reached the point of taking some new measures. Suggestions are welcome.

Posted by the Flea at 06:11 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Bullet Time

Bullet Time is a simple, clever webgame that should reduce any of today's nail-biting anxiety. Now... if only I could figure out the controls.

Posted by the Flea at 06:09 AM | TrackBack (0)

Sarah Michelle Gellar

Sarah Michelle Gellar recently graced the pages of Esquire UK (via The Superficial).

Posted by the Flea at 06:07 AM | TrackBack (0)

This is anger-management

Why did it take this Better Living Toronto warblogger round-up for me to learn of Raymi the Minx?

Raymi was kicked out of her ex-boyfriend's band two summers ago but he kept it a secret because he was a big pussy and was too afraid to tell her for three weeks and finally everyone else told her and she went to his birthday party with his present all smashed up in the box with other garbage and wrote f* you on it and his picture was torn in half down the middle of his face.
Posted by the Flea at 06:03 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Pop Shoppe

The Pop Shoppe is back by popular demand. Flea-readers unfamiliar with this Canadian institution may refer to my previous Pop Shoppe post (via Better Living Centre).

Not only could you buy soft drinks at The Pop Shoppe but you could also find a wide assortment of snack foods also produced under The Pop Shoppe brand, along with bottle openers, hats, t-shirts and Frisbee's. Some of the more memorable advertising campaigns included a cartoon character named Captain Cola, but the most memorable was the hiring of NHL great Eddie Shack as the spokesman for The Pop Shoppe.

Does anyone have an image of Captain Cola? Now off to eBay to look for The Pop Shoppe memorabilia...

Posted by the Flea at 05:57 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

Notre Céline Nationale

Paul Jané is ranting about Air Canada. Make some popcorn, sit back and enjoy the show.

Sure, we've had our small differences, such as when you were the first airline to ban smoking on all of its flights - which made me use Air France way more than I ever would have wanted - or when it finally dawned upon me that the logic behind your fare structure was Byzantine - to put it mildly, 500$ to fly from here to London, but 1300$ to go to St. John, NB?! -; I've even managed to put up with your constant dithering over flying to Madrid or not, even in spite of the fact that every time I actually want to go to Madrid, I invariably find out that the route has been cancelled in favour of some craphole in the middle of nowhere (who the f*ck wants to go to Lima, Peru, honestly!?), but this time, you've finally gone too far.

The funny thing is I quite like the Celine ads...

Posted by the Flea at 05:54 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Women no longer silenced

Jessica's Well contrasts Hollywood women with Afghan women (though I will worship Drew Barrymore no matter what she says).

Take a good look at the photo on the left. In the foreground are four women. From the left, Drew Barrymore and Cameron Diaz. Two major movie stars who pull down roughly $15-20 million per movie...for 6 to 12 weeks work. Next is Christina Aguilera, a pop music diva. On the far right, of course, is Oprah Winfree. Three multi-millionaires and a multi-billionaire.

(via Instapundit)

Posted by the Flea at 05:50 AM | TrackBack (0)

November 01, 2004

Dir en Grey

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The Flea's quest for Japanese "visual rock" music in Toronto drew blank looks and no records in the computer at HMV's Canadian flagship store. There was a certain more goth than thou satisfaction to be had but I was left gloomy, nay morose, as I continue to pine for the musical stylings of whatever the heck Dir en Grey sounds like. MasaManiA has images of Dir en Grey fans to tide me over. Remember folks: you are Japanese (and Swedish) goths so no smiling!

Posted by the Flea at 09:44 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (2)

Kournikova

I admit it. Any post featuring the words "Anna Kournikova" is just trolling for hits (and that's leaving out the words "bikini" and "candid").

Posted by the Flea at 09:34 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Plucking

Plucking unsightly nose hair makes for a peculiar web-game.

Posted by the Flea at 09:33 AM | TrackBack (0)

Rotation

Rotation is just the thing to lower office productivity in 130 countries!

Posted by the Flea at 09:31 AM | TrackBack (0)

Squashed Philosophers

Squashed Philosophers presents the books "which defined the way The West thinks now."

Condensed and abridged to keep the substance, the style and the quotes, but ditching all that irritating verbiage.

The Freud summary is particularly satisfactory.

Posted by the Flea at 09:27 AM | TrackBack (0)

Twins

My favourite part of this psychoanalytic parable is that the couple in question are both dentists. I want to know what the other sister does for a living. Probably a stunt double.

A Romanian man is demanding a divorce after finding out he married the twin sister of the woman he fell in love with. Vladut R, from Constanta, lived for three years with his wife Monica but says he couldn't go on with the "ordeal" because he loved her sister.

The man met the "love of his life" - Elena - a few years ago during a trip to France. They were supposed to meet up again back in Romania but the woman decided not to stay in touch after she suffered an accident and needed time to recover. Meanwhile, Vladut met his lover's twin sister, Monica, at the seaside and thought it was the girl of his dreams.

She accepted his marriage proposal, not telling him the truth about her sister. Now the couple, who are both dentists, have agreed about to divorce so the man can be back together with the right sister.
Posted by the Flea at 09:23 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Vanities

I admire Tom Wolfe if only for this sentiment. I share it.

So what is it about his liberal neighbours and fellow diners in his adoptive New York that Wolfe cannot abide?

"I cannot stand the lock-step among everyone in my particular world. They all do the same thing, without variation. It gets so boring. There is something in me that particularly wants it registered that I am not one of them."
Posted by the Flea at 09:14 AM | TrackBack (0)

Monkey? Pizza? Death? Oompa Loompa?

Edward Gorey I
You are DEATH!
Oooo.... Scary...
Well, not, you are just a dark, depressed person
who feels pained by society, and we love you
for that.


Monkey? Pizza? Death? Oompa Loompa?
brought to you by Quizilla

Posted by the Flea at 09:07 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)