Ghost of a flea

Saturnalia

Remember: Saturn is the reason for the season!

Don't even ask what they do down the Temple of Mithras Update: It's a war on Christmas! That isn't the baby Jesus he is eating is it? Saturn: Why does he hate us?

Regina Spektor: Samson

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Clock DVA: The Hacker

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Really? I was very briefly in a band called Clock DVA.

This gets a billion points for the Coil reference alone. "Munchausen" is the single of the year. And about time too; we only have a few weeks to go. Not safe for work, by the way (via Warren Ellis). There is a video at the No Bra website but it has somehow yet to migrate to YouTube.

Ahh, just watched the video. Ok, NOT safe for work. Not safe for YouTube. Pretty much not safe for anywhere. I'm pissing myself laughing though.

Wolfsheim: Find You're Here

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

There and back again

My fears Peter Jackson may not direct the so-called prequel to The Lord of the Rings have been assuaged by two pieces of news. First, the film rights revert away from New Line Cinema in short order; Jackson may be back in the director's seat. Second, rumours of his only possible replacement: Sam Raimi (with a nod of the hat to Elvis).

Considering how differently The Hobbit reads from LOTR there is a certain sense to different feel to the film. Colour me cautiously optimistic.

Handicapable

The Flea's coverage of Trafalgar Square's empty plinth continues with reference to Mark Steyn who notes an important observation on the subject; this one deserves the widest possible audience. Scroll down to Monumental Significance.

Related: The Captain of HMS Victory comes face to face with Nelson. Tangentially related: The disturbing statuary of Oslo.

Rob Zombie: Living Dead Girl

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm

This apparently accurate quiz arrives via Agent Bedhead. They got my accent right too.

Takako Minekawa: Plash

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

The Company of Barber-Surgeons and Robotics notwithstanding

Goth or not goth: Montieth's mutton chops. A small hint: I am extremely jealous of Montieth's mutton chops.

If this one leaves you stumped you might considering helping your robot escape a maze. It becomes stress inducing as Friday becomes shorter and shorter.

Not By Strength, by Guile

Babbling Brooks reviews Casino Royale, pointing to the film's website and an MI6 dossier of the new double-O. Flea-readers who have yet to see the film should exercise caution as a harmless detail for some is a spoiler to others. One biographical fact deserving particular attention is Bond's record of service with the SBS; a nice compromise which accounts for his special forces training while keeping his Royal Navy pedigree intact.

The novel really is excellent too, btw. Virginia Postrel quotes from Simon Winder's The Man Who Saved Britain and a vignette I had forgotten. We latter-day Bond fans have developed palettes sufficiently jaded to forget the meaning of the word "exotic".

Small point of Flea biographical interest: I consulted for Vickers for two years. I was working submarines but I did know the head of Land & Armaments procurement. Good times. Good times.

Vanessa Paradis: Commando

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Bad news

New Line Cinema prepares to sacrifice the goose which laid the golden egg on an altar of stupid. First, unless they are planning to dramatize bits of the Silmarillion two prequels to The Lord of the Rings is a bad idea. Second, any film version of The Hobbit that does not feature Peter Jackson in the director's chair risks heresy. Tread carefully, New Line.

Jabberwocky Division

Is it just me or can you sing along to Joy Division's "Love Will Tear Us Apart" to the words of Lewis Carroll's "Jabberwocky"? "And the mome raths... outgrabe."

I must be in a mood or something. A space mirror would sort that out.

Diamanda Galas: Gloomy Sunday

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Coffee-punk

At last, the coffee maker of the Flea. A Cafetino is on my list of things to acquire once my schemes come to fruition: Just the thing for a morning brew on my crime-fighting zeppelin. I admit they could work on the name; "vac pot" is insufficiently steam-punk sounding (via Last of the Kuiper Bedouins).

In related news, this shopped image of Magdalene Veen. Wonderful.

White Town: Your Woman

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Suffering from LDDS?

Losticil may be right for you.

That's more like it

Jeff Simon writing for The Buffalo News calls the Bond reboot Bond Reborn. There are a couple quasi-spoilers at the linked article but no real surprises if you have read the novel; this is a remarkably faithful adaptation of Ian Fleming's work. Cautious types have this quote to be getting on with until they see the film.

Quite. For fear of aforementioned spoilage I shall say nothing except that this is the best Bond film ever made. Yes, I am including all the Sean Connery films. Yes, that means this a better Bond than From Russia With Love, a better Bond than Dr. No. Time to see the film if you have not already done so. Cubicle-bound Flea-readers wishing to adopt a more secret-agenty lifestyle might peruse cars, cocktails, watches and other assorted marketing. Not to forget a careful consideration of Eva Green and, of course, the Judi Dench lesbian scene that was not to be.

One last thing, I admit Ace is mostly right about Act Four. Mostly. Now going to watch Dr. No again to test my absurd claims of the above paragraph.

The Flying Lizards: TV

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

PS - Money don't get everything it's true.

Draconian regulation

Trading standards officers force a name-change on Welsh Dragon sausages as “(t)he product was not sufficiently precise to inform a purchaser of the true nature of the food.” It turns out the sausages are made from chili, leak and pork and not dragon as naive consumers might be lead to believe (via Rantburg).

Women

Will someone please explain women to me?
Thanks in advance.

- The Flea

A woman's guess Update: SondraK says tonight is not the night to ask.

Two solitudes Update: Agent Bedhead is also having a day.

Fashion claims another victim

Brazil mourns as another model is lost to anorexia and, supposedly, the remorseless exigencies of fashion. Sad, indeed. But does Brazil mourn for the loss of fat people to a bewildering variety of consequent health problems? It does not.

And I do not expect Brazil mourns for the Posh that was. Victoria Beckham is not so much transhuman as transcontrived. Spare a moment for Bryony Gordon in your prayers, an intrepid soul who followed Beckham's That Extra Half an Inch style prescriptions for a week such that the rest of a yearning humanity might be spared the task. Flea-readers considering the Beckham style-plunge might first consult Simon Mills' assessment. It isn't pretty.

Lady Sovereign: A Little bit of Shhh!

She's sick... No, she's ill! Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.*

* Love Me Or Hate Me has a more corporate look and a more corporate sound; somebody has decided Lady Sovereign is worth the investment and I expect they are right. She looks well fit. Still, there is a sad inevitability to an artist putting out a love me or hate me, I am not polished looking or sounding tune just after they have slimmed down, had their hair professionally styled and juiced up the production.

My love for you is like a truck

I looks as though Xbox 360 has made a massive on-line ad-buy to coincide with the release of the PS3. Always willing to do my bit, I have just watched the new trailer for the only first-person shooter I want to play this side of Halo 3, Gears of War. While the trailer has camera angles I would not expect to find in game-play the whole was rendered using the same Unreal Engine. Stunning. The story-line is also worth pondering; the Xbox 360 site summary does not do it justice.

Revolutionary

I should make it clear I have not ordered anything from G. Gedney Godwin but their stock looks extraordinary. 18th-century spectacles, bronze swivel guns... even period medical instruments. More Flea than Flea.

Also worth a look, or at least a listen, is this BBC World Service documentary on the archaeology of patriotism. I particularly enjoyed the interviews at Williamsburg in part two.

Front 242: Headhunter

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Perrier Jouet Belle Epoque

Sure it is expensive but if it is not a Taittinger or a Bollinger I am still not interested. I will leave this Perrier Jouet Belle Epoque business to the hoppers.*

* Unless Posh and Becks like it.

Ani DiFranco: Untouchable Face

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance (nsfw due to F-bomb).

Kirsten Flagstad: Brunhilde's Battle Cry

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance. And maybe team up with Bob Hope and go kick some ass.

Transylvania's finest

I sensed a disturbance in the Force and sure enough it was the Cheeky Girls auditioning for Geri Halliwell. For Flea-readers with short attention spans, here are the Cheeky Girls on Top of the Pops. If anyone has access to a high-res version please to let me know. Then there is this toothache of an interview; worth it for the accents of the twins, single and beautiful (possibly nsfw due to swearing Irish puppets).

Also, the Cheeky Girls at MySpace. OMFG there is a Right Said Fred cover... ok, give me a minute here. "Text Me I Love You" could be huge.

Enigma: Age of Loneliness (Carly's Song)

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

It is called a utility belt

Sgt Tony Smith and PC Mike Holman successfully apprehended a drugs suspect thanks in part to their ingenious Batman and Robin disguises. I note the senior officer got to be Batman.

Singing with Elvis

Ardolino thinks linking to a Life of Brian clip equals geek. Yet this is as nothing compared to Hawk the Slayer linkage. Strange how the primal D&D urge can overcome the simple biology of sexual reproduction; hence the decline of the West. Someone should get Mark Steyn on the problem. But I digress.

Hawk the Slayer was only one of countless immortal screen appearances by Jack Palance (though regrettably he appears in neither of the above clips... have a little Sudden Fear instead). The Flea worships at the altar of cheese but before Jack Palance I am as nothing. Truly, he stood alone.

Flea-dance tips

I am working on a little piece (more or less) about gesture in Roman public speaking but my brain juice is flagging on this, the last day of the working week. So I present instead Planearium's improved South Park character generator (with a tip of my coachman's hat to Agent Bedhead).

Which brings me to this contentious South Park clip: Goth or not goth?

Yaki-Da: I Saw You Dancing

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Everything is better in India

Even if they are not quite clear on the Marvel vs DC thing.

A little bit showbiz

Flea-readers who have wondered what Kylie might be like were she within smelling distance need wonder no more: La Minogue has launched a signature fragrance. Shame it is by Coty as I have been underwhelmed by their previous celebrity tie-in products. I have no trouble imagining Kylie wears her LoveKylie line. I do have trouble believing a whiff of Darling equals of whiff of Kylie up close; possibly due to the missing suspension of disbelief factor. One can only hope the Thierry Wasser connection gets the balance right.

Dar' Update: More Kylie here.

Olivia Newton-John & John Travolta: You're The One That I Want

Before Kylie Minogue there was Olivia Newton-John. Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Dead Can Dance: The Host Of Seraphim

Baraka's an amazing film. And this song is great. I never thought poverty could have such a great soundtrack.

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Mere anarchy Update: Not ready to listen to the inevitable BBC Tourette's reading of today's new world quite yet. First, a White Stripes enabled Kate Moss pole dancing to Philip Glass's Violin Concerto No. II. Much better.

If not now, when?

Seeing the Unseen is the first installment of Bill Whittle's latest. I agree the importance of the following (as with much else).

Also worth a look: Flight Patterns. It might as well have been called Civilization; is the Enlightenment, animated.

Fashion is a vitamin for style

Pink Tentacle reports on the Hyper Space Couture Design Contest. These looks are so hot they are from the near future.

I am holding out for Wilma Deering. Ripped abs, don't fail me now!

I don't drink... wine Update: Ok, I am not saying I am a space vampire. I am only saying I can relate to space vampires.

Silver Jews: How Can I Love You (If You Won't Lie Down)

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Thames Town

The Scotsman reports Chinese pirates have made off with bits of Lyme Regis as an eerie simulated England has appeared an hour outside of Shanghai. Thames Town hosts a pub, a chippie and a bronze Winston Churchill against a backdrop of newlyweds looking for a picturesque location.

I will trade them for more Blade Runner at Dundas and Spadina.

South Korea moving to legalize miniskirts

The headline speaks for itself.

Thank heavens for that. Careful though: It could lead to dancing.

Related: This fantastic new Pocky ad.

Psychic TV: Message From The Temple

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

She's lovely, really

Hard on the heels of a new fashion Bible book launch, Perez Hilton tracks down an appealing interview with Victoria Beckham, not as transhuman as her still photos often make her out to be.

Dwight Yoakam: Suspicious Minds

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

On while we are on the subject... "Honky Tonk Man": goth or not goth? Grades are assigned on the basis of how you reach your proof rather than the answer itself.

Strange new worlds

When I first heard Paramount was tinkering with original Trek with the aim to produce an "enhanced" version I can only describe my reaction as incredulous skepticism shading into trembling outrage. Visions of a Greedoesque farce with yet another George Lucas-style banalization of a cherished classic left me dreading the result. It was, therefore, with some trepidation that I started to watch the enhanced version of "Balance of Terror", my favourite ever Star Trek episode.

It is a tour de force. Paramount has left the original cheese-factor intact. If anything, these new versions max-out the cheese-factor rendering the enhanced Trek more original than the original. So what has been "enhanced", exactly? First, this post post-production punches up the blacks. Deep space now looks properly deep and every interior shot has the satisfying contrast of a multi-million dollar per episode contemporary effort such as the revamped Battlestar Galactica. Every time Uhura swivels on her communications station chair the rich luster of its pleatherette surface glints in the light of the bridge. The re-engineered sound of the enhanced Trek is also Immediately noticeable. Corridors and inter-ship announcements have been re-mastered with a subtle reverb, photon torpedoes detonate with a juicy thump and incidental music sounds richer; all of this without substituting new sound effects for old or replacing period music with some ludicrous contemporary version. Visual effects have been seriously juiced up. Planetscapes and exterior shots of various ships, most importantly Enterprise herself, are careful CGI reproductions of the original models. These new versions, however, are more detailed and have richer contrast. We can now see the turning of Enterprise' warp nacelles and phaser blasts light up the underside of her saucer section. The result is frankly wondrous. This is how the show was always supposed to look.

Where the enhanced version takes liberties with the original it does so in ways that are respectful and true to the aim of making the show more Trek than Trek. The original circular dots that stood in for passing stars in deep space are still circular dots passing for stars in deep space. But now each lovingly reproduced "star" produces depth of field with a subtle parallax motion in relation to its peers. My favourite addition so far is nictitating membrane action in "Arena"; Gorns can blink!

Flea-readers who have yet to see the enhanced Trek can check out side-by-side comparisons of original verses enhanced visual imagery at StarTrek.com. The enhanced title sequence demonstrates a number of the points I have outlined.

Humana humana Update: Just watched the enhanced "City On the Edge of Forever" featuring the enhanced Joan Collins, so hot she is from an alternate reality.

Jitterbug Party

Imagine it is a Harlem night at 142nd Street and Lenox Avenue; the year is 1935. Five years ago a new house band took over a venue that had hosted Duke Ellington and where audiences first heard a sixteen-year old Lena Horne. Tonight Paramount Pictures brings the stark light for the cameras is making the scene even hotter than usual. We are here for a return appearance of Cab Calloway’s Cotton Club Orchestra and, if we are lucky, an invite to a Jitterbug Party after hours. If we stay up late there may be time for some shim sham shimmy...

Lena Horne: Stormy Weather

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

Laurie Anderson: O Superman

Now is the time at the Flea when we dance.

When love is gone, there's always justice.
And when justice is gone, there's always force.
And when force is gone, there's always Mom.
Hi Mom!

Choose your next witticism carefully

Former head of MI6, Sir Richard Dearlove (the spy formerly known as "C") says Canada needs its own foreign intelligence service. An excellent idea; if anyone in the know is recruiting down the line, do keep me in mind. I am available for training/consultancy in the finer points of baccarat and champagne-selection that are sure to come up.

On a related note: This hideously misconceived James Bond 007 TX Spy Gear Bundle from Sony. I see this one is missing its "needs to be glassed" sticker.